Spring Fling
by EverTheDreamer
Summary: One of her hands fell to her stomach, "Sixteen months of doing for me is what got us here in the first place." "You don't want the baby." "That's not what I said, Jerry. Of course I want the baby." Libby/Jerry affair au, pre-season 2 through post 4.
1. Chapter 1

"Jerry, I- we need to talk," she breathed out, looking down at her hands. … This was so _ridiculous_. How could she have made such a _mistake_? She was _married_. With _children_.

"I _knew_ it," he smiled, putting his feet up on the desk. "I _knew_ you'd come crawling back. You can't _not_ work for me. You'd _miss_ me, wouldn't ya, Libs? You'd _miss_-"

"Shut up," she instructed, swallowing thickly.

"Well, if you're gonna be like _that_, I don't know that I'm gonna let ya come back," he told her, smirking. He had all the cards but... not for the reasons he thought. "Maybe I don't need ya. Maybe I feel like I could find a _younger_ assistant."

"I don't _want_ to come back," she ground out, looking up at him. "This- Jerry, this is more _important_ than being your _assistant_."

"Oh? And what could be _that important_?" he challenged, sitting up.

"_I'm pregnant_," she whispered, looking at her hands again.

"What?"

"I said I'm-"

"No, I heard you," he interrupted, standing up. He looked past her, through the glass at all his employees as they stared back, eager to watch the exchange. After all, _no one_ thought Libby Thacher was going to come 'crawling back.' … Not even him, much as he'd gloated and insisted. "What-uhm... What does that have to do with _me_?"

She looked up, glaring, as she hissed, "_What do you think?_"

"It's m – It can't be mine," he shrugged, acting like he wasn't affected.

"Well I don't think it was immaculate conception," she snapped, one of her hands moving to her stomach before she remembered no one else knew. She moved her hand to her hip instead, pursing her lips.

"You have a husband," he reminded.

"Who hasn't _touched me_ in seven months," she finished for him. "Do I _look_ seven months _pregnant_, Jerry?"

"Y-you're _sure_?" he stuttered, looking at her.

"I talked to my doctor three hours ago," she swallowed again, looking down at her mostly flat stomach, "... I'm nine and a half weeks along."

His eyes flicked down her stomach as well, he _almost _reaching to touch her before remembering their audience, "Wh – what can I do? D – do you _want_ to come back? Are you gonna file for divorce? Do you need a place to stay? D – Do you wanna marry me? I don't have a ring, but I can buy you one. What do you want? Gold? White gold?"

She shook her head, looking up at him, "I _can't_ leave Drew."

"He doesn't love you, Libs. Not like _I_ do," he told her instantly.

"I know," she mouthed, nodding.

"Then _why_ would you st-"

"_Corky_," she breathed, biting her lip and shaking her head, "He couldn't take it if Drew and I split. He just _couldn't_. He doesn't deal well with _change_."

"Oh. R – Yeah. Absolutely, right... What do I do? … Libs, I don't – I have no idea what I'm _doing_. _Tell me_ what to _do_," he begged.

"I-"

"Oh, my God. Sit down! Why are you standing?" he demanded, leading her to the chairs and forcing her to sit down before sitting opposite her. "You're pregnant. You should be off your feet!"

She chuckled, smiling indulgently, "Jerry, hun.. I'm barely showing. I don't think it's a big deal yet."

"B-_barely_? You're showing then? Can – can I see?" he smiled hopefully, looking at her stomach again.

"I don't think I could show you without causing a scandal in the office," she reminded, looking pointedly to the glass separating his office.

"Right," he nodded. "... Later? At the usual place? … I can take a long lunch and..." he trailed off meaningfully.

"I'd like that," she breathed, looking down at her knees.

"... What're you gonna tell Drew?" he asked, tempted to reach for her and take her hand. He _knew_ she was struggling in the marriage and he didn't see _how_ she was going to tell him this without her _bastard_ of a husband blowing up. … And if that son of a bitch laid a single _hand_ on her-

"_Nothing_," she answered seriously.

"B – seven months, Libs? I think he'll _know_," he pointed out.

"I- I know... I have t-to..." she swallowed thickly, looking at her wedding band, "_today_ if I want him to believe it's his."

"You're gonna-"

"Don't you _dare_ judge me," she snapped, looking up.

He shook his head, putting his hands up in submission, "I _wasn't_. I would _never_."

"... I _have_ to," she ground out, sounding defeated. "For _all_ my babies."

"What about for _you?_" he insisted.

She pursed her lips, one of her hands falling to her stomach, "_Sixteen months_ of doing _for me_ is what got us here in the _first place_."

"You don't want the baby," he supplied, looking hurt.

"That's not what I said, Jerry. Of _course_ I want the baby. I just..." She shook her head, "This was _selfish_. We – We should've been more _careful._ I have a family, babies... This could _destroy_ them."

"... Will you come back, Libs?" he asked.

She shook her head, "I don't think Dr-"

"How else can I _be_ with you?"

She ran her tongue over her lips before nodding, "..Okay. But.. Not now. Give me _time_. I need... to make things better with Drew first, to convince him that we're okay."

"How long?" he tried to sit back, to act like he wasn't hurt or anxious.

"I don't know," she admitted. "A month? Maybe a month and a half... Enough time to convince him the baby is his."

"... Can I still see you?" he asked, almost begging.

"I..." she looked at her knees again before nodding. "Once a week."

"_Every day_?" he pleaded, scooting forward.

".. But _Drew_... I- he'd _notice_, Jer," she looked up. "He's not the _brightest_ but... he'd _notice_."

"But I _love_ you," he whispered, reaching and taking her hand.

"Y- I... three times a week," she offered, staring at him in shock – he'd never _told_ her point blank, only in veiled terms.

"_Five_," he pressed. ".. You're carrying my _baby_."

"_Four_," she conceded, looking down at their joined hands. "... Jerry, let go. They're _watching_."

He reluctantly dropped her hand, "And you'll meet me at the usual place?"

"In an hour," she nodded.

"Thank you," he whispered.

* * *

><p>"Fivemoreminutes," she grumbled, rolling into the soft caresses from warm hands.<p>

"As long as you want."

… That wasn't her husband.

She blinked her eyes open sleepily, smiling when she saw Jerry smiling down at her as he played with her hair and rubbed her shoulder.

"... Hi there, stranger," she murmured, closing her eyes and scooting closer.

He leaned down, brushing a kiss over her head, "Hey, Libs... How long ya been here?"

"What time did I leave the o-ffice?" she asked, yawning through the last word, to answer his question.

"An hour and a half ago. Sorry I'm late. I had an _amazing_ assistant but she quit so the office is like a three ring circus of pandemonium without her," he told her, squeezing her lightly.

".. It's so _quiet_ here. I have no quiet in my life," she lamented, pouting against his leg.

"You do here. Anytime you want," he promised.

She groaned, "Don't tell me that; I'll never _leave_."

"That's fine with me, Libs. I could get used to you as a permanent fixture here," he laughed. "... Or around the office."

"Don't start," she whined, still half-asleep.

"Well... Why do ya think my fantastic assistant quit?" he ventured, playfully trying to distance her. "Do ya think it was me? … I didn't mean to upset her or make her feel unappreciated... I really did think her idea for the campaign was genius."

"I think... She was stressed and couldn't take the man she loves putting her down just then. .. Not when she'd taken a pregnancy test that morning and found out she was carrying his baby when she was married to another man," she admitted, not looking up at him.

".._Libs_," he shook his head, closing his eyes. "Why didn't you _tell_ me?"

"I was going to," she insisted, looking up at him again, "but then you just made me _so mad_. … I didn't even mean to quit but I- I didn't think you'd _respect_ me if I came crawling back the next day, begging for my job back cause I'd _miss_ you."

"You didn't think _I'd_ miss you _too_?" he laughed, petting her affectionately. "I missed you _so much_ the last four and a half weeks, Libs. … I thought I'd go _crazy_ without you."

"You're already crazy," Libby teased, lightening the subject.

"... Why didn't you tell me _earlier_ that you were pregnant, Libby?" he asked, laying down beside her and wrapping an arm around her before letting his hand fall to her stomach.

"I wanted to be _sure_. I mean.. Jerry, I'm forty-one. It could've been menopause, I could've lost the baby." She paused, looking down at his hand covering her stomach, before admitting, "… I've already lost two. I didn't want to tell you until Sylvia had _confirmed_ it."

"But I would've gone _with_ you," Jerry reminded.

She shook her head, reaching down and tugging her blouse out of where it was still – mostly – tucked into her skirt to reveal a few inches of skin and exposing the small swell of her stomach. She led his hand to cover her warm stomach, smiling up at him as she absently played with his fingers.

"... I should've _known_ you were pregnant," he told her, seeming upset with himself.

"Why?"

"You were so hormonal. And more than that... Libs, you're _glowing_," he smiled again, pressing a kiss to her head.

"Oh, stop," she pouted, playfully nudging him. "Don't tease."

"I'm not," he insisted, "You're absolutely radiant."

"No _teasing_," she ordered, "or you don't get a copy of the sonogram."

"You brought it?" Jerry smiled hopefully, ignoring her empty threat.

"It's in my purse," she nodded at the dresser, indicating her open bag. "One for you and one for me."

He slithered out from where she was leaning on him, carefully moving a pillow to take his place, before hurrying over to her bag and digging through it. "Where?"

She smiled, getting out of bed and wrapping an arm around him as she pulled an envelope out with her right. "In the envelope, you silly, pig-headed man. You wouldn't be able to find your nose if it wasn't attached to your face," she teased, raising a hand and tapping his nose affectionately.

"Which is exactly why I need you to come back to the office as soon as possible," he returned, not looking at her as he opened the envelope and eagerly pulled out the sonograms. "... This is it?"

"Jerry!" she scolded, stepping back and glaring up at him.

He turned the picture, looking at it from different angles, "... It looks like a peanut."

"That is our _baby_," she growled, reaching out and snatching the picture away. "And if you think it just looks like a _peanut_ well... I'll go home and you can just go to the circus and watch kids throw replicas of our baby at the elephants." She grabbed her purse, storming away and pausing by the bed to shove her feet into her shoes.

"No, no – Libs! Come on! I didn't mean it like that!" Jerry followed her, reaching out and grabbing her arm.

"Don't _touch_ me," she hissed, shrugging him away. "And ya know what? I'm _glad_ I quit. Now I don't have to _see_ you ever again."

"Libby-"

"_No_. You think our baby looks like a _peanut _– a _peanut_, Jerry!" she yelled, almost shaking. "It's not a peanut. It's _supposed_ to be the embodiment of our love and you've reduced it to... _peanuts_. That's all I mean to you: peanuts."

"Libs, that's not what I _said_," he reminded.

"But it's what you _meant_," she finished, one of her hands going to her hip. "Isn't it, Jerry? Isn't i-"

He kissed her, pulling her into his arms, "I don't want to fight with the _beautiful_ woman carrying my child. Especially not when I love her as much as I do."

She closed her eyes, resting her forehead against his shoulder, "... It's not a peanut."

"I know," he agreed, he led her back to the bedroom and fluffed the pillows before ushering her onto the bed. "So why don't you show me where everything is."

She smiled, holding the sonogram out and running her finger over it, "Well, he's an inch long and weighs point zero six five ounces."

"... Is that big?" he asked tentatively, not wanting to upset her again.

She grinned up at him, and shook her head, "He's a little on the small size of average. His little heart beats a hundred and sixty-five times a minute."

"Strong heartbeat?" he wrapped an arm around her, scooting closer.

Her finger traced the shape of her baby again before pointing, "See that? That's one of his eyes. And his little nose. And that's his foot."

"He's cute," he nodded, smiling at how enraptured she was just looking at the sonogram.

"You're _teasing_ again," she pouted, tearing her eyes away from the picture.

"I'm not, Libs," he promised. "He _is_ cute... And so are you."

She smiled, her hand falling to her lower abdomen. "... He's growing right now, Jer. …. How long's your lunch?" she asked, looking up at him.

"Never long enough," he shook his head, still smiling.

"I've missed you," she breathed, running her tongue over her plump lips and scooting closer so she could rest her head against his chest.

"I missed you too, Libby," he admitted, wrapping an arm around her and lightly massaging her lower back.

She let out a strangled breath before trying to push him backwards onto the bed, "... Do we have time for a nap?" He quirked a smile she couldn't see. "Being pregnant makes me so _tired_."

"Yeah," he nodded, "I figured that when I came in and found you asleep."

"You try growing a functioning heart and eyes and see if it doesn't take a lot out of you," she pouted, half whining. "... It's more tiring than working as your assistant, I'll tell ya that."

"Well, you do it all so well. You make it seem _effortless_," he assured her, gently petting her again.

She shook her head, arguing, "That's cause you don't see the morning sickness."

"... I wish I could help you with the morning sickness," he offered quietly.

Smiling, she hugged him closer, "Don't worry about it, Jer."

He rubbed her lower back again, "But I _do_ worry about. Knowing now... I just... I wish I could do something."

"I think Drew would notice if you were crouched behind me holding my hair back," she laughed, shaking her head again.

"... Not at the office," he reminded.

She pursed her lips, sitting up, "Where everyone else would notice? Besides, I _told_ you: I _can't_ come back yet."

"I know, I _know_," he pacified, raising a hand in surrender as he tried to rub her back with the other.

"Why are you _pushing_ me on this?" she demanded. "You know I can't leave Drew because of Corky."

"I know," he repeated, "... But that doesn't mean I won't always _want_ you to so I can _really_ be with you, Libs."

".. I want it too," she buried her face against him again.

"L-_Libs..._Don't _cry_," he ran his hands over her back again.

"I-I just – Corky's come so far and I _love_ him the way he is. W-we've pushed him and he's never stopped trying and I don't know what about him would have been _changed_ if he hadn't been a Down's baby but.. I've never wished for him to be any different," she told him crying into his shirt.

"I know, Libs. He's a very impressive young man," he nodded. "You should be very proud."

"But I _do_ wish he were different now," Libby admitted, "so that I _could_ leave Drew so we could really _be_ together!"

"... Maybe you're... not giving Corky enough credit," he ventured.

"He's barely been functioning since Paige moved out," she revealed, looking up at him sadly. "His math grades took a dive. … We think he may have to go to summer school."

"Well, that'd give him something to focus on," he shrugged. "It'll give you – _us – _time to figure out what we're doing... If you.. decide you wanna leave Drew."

"You _know_ I want to leave Drew," she reminded. "... It's not an option."

"... But he's not even-" he shook his head, "the restaurant business is so _dicey._ If you come back, you'll be making more. .. And _I_ could give you more, I can provide better."

"That's not what it's about and you know it," she whispered. "... I don't _care_ what you can give me. I _love_ you. .. But that doesn't change that I can't leave Drew. I would _love_ to have that luxury but... _Corky_."

"Break it to him easy," he pleaded. "Try to make it a hypothetical."

"He wouldn't _understand_. He knows what the word means but... when his emotions get involved..." she shook her head. "I _can't_, Jer."

"... I know. .. But ya can't blame a guy for askin'," he smiled, holding her tightly. "You wanted a nap, right? G'head. I'll be here."

She clutched him tightly, shaking her head against him, "But I've _missed_ you."

He squeezed her shoulder, promising, "I'll be _right here_ when you wake up. Take your nap; enjoy the quiet."

She grumbled in the back of her throat, clutching him tightly and moving partially on top of him before falling asleep, the sonogram clutched to her chest.

* * *

><p>"Whereyagoin'?" she grumbled when he moved beneath her.<p>

Jerry pet her hair lightly, "_Shh. Go back to sleep. I have to call the office to tell them I'll be in later._"

She whined, clutching him, "You're the boss. Call later."

"I was taught not to do that by that wonderful assistant that quit. She liked to remind me that other people's time is just as important as mine and that when I didn't let someone know, I threw off _everyone's_ schedule," he reminded, petting her back affectionately.

Libby shook her head against him, "_No. … Our peanut says you should stay here and not move._"

He smiled, leaning to kiss her head, "Just to the kitchen and back, Libs. I have to let them know."

She made a loud noise of disapproval in the back of her throat, gripping him tightly, "I don't _want_ you to move."

"I'll be really fast, Libs," he promised. "Just a quick call and I'll be right back."

She pouted, stipulating, "Really quick. And then you lay with me."

"Of course," he nodded, kissing her head again before slithering out from beneath her, a pillow moved into his place before he went to the kitchen.

She exhaled, sitting up and starting to peel her blouse from her body before unbuckling her skirt and tossing both items to the mattress beside her. She looked down at her body, swallowing and running her hand over the slight swell of her stomach. "Stockings," she remembered aloud, leaning back on the bed and pushing at them until she managed to peel them from her legs.

"J-" She couldn't do that. She couldn't holler for him to hurry up when he was calling the office. What if they recognized her voice? Their affair had to be a _secret_ cause of Drew. … So she'd have to wait. Or physically go get him.

Chewing her lip, she started to slide out of bed before she heard his footsteps start their return, she climbing back into bed and holding her breath – what if he wasn't _attracted _to her now that she was starting to show? What if he just loved her but didn't want sex till after she'd had the baby and hit pre-pregnancy weight? Maybe 'long lunch' just meant napping and eating not... _this_.

"One sec, Libs? I realized I haven't eaten so I'm gonna make some lunch – And by 'make,' I mean order. You know I don't cook. Ya want anyth – _whoa!_" he stopped, his eyes wide. "Libs, I thought you were _sleepin_'."

She pulled the comforter up to cover herself, not looking at him, "I-uhm – Ye – Or I could go. I should go." She nodded, "You have to get back to work and I should be home when the kids get in." Her fingers shook as she grabbed her skirt, foregoing the stockings since they'd take too long to put back on and she'd be in this awkward position longer – besides, she'd just change when she got home anyway.

He perched beside her, his fingers curling around her wrist, "Libs- Libs – _Libby_. Look at me." She reluctantly looked up, feeling foolish. "Why are you in such a hurry to run outta here?" She shook her head, looking down again. "What, I don't see you for four and a half weeks and then you nap in my bed and then tear outta here? A man could start to take offense to that," he teased, smiling.

"You- I just thought-" she stammered, holding her skirt in front of her chest.

"_Relax_, Libs," he curled an arm around her, taking her skirt. He tilted his head slightly, kissing her neck, "I think you're _beautiful_. So don't go 'just thinkin'' anything to the contrary."

She exhaled, closing her eyes and dropping her hand, "_Oh, Jerry..._" She tilted her head back, giving him more room, and he took the opportunity to continue pressing kisses to her neck, lips and tongue teasing soft moans out of her. She nearly melted when smoothed his hand along her side, his mouth moving to the spot below her ear. Her eyelids fluttered, her fingers raising and fisting in his hair, "_O- oh..._"

He smiled against her skin, moving from behind her and laying her back against the pillows before leaning over her to continue kissing her neck, "_That's it, Libs._" He ran his hand down her side again, her skin warm, before smoothing it up her arm to guide her bra strap from her shoulder, pressing a kiss there as he wormed his hand beneath her to unhook her bra.

"You- J- _oh_-" she murmured as he pulled her bra cup down, kissing along the swell of her breast. She bent her leg, digging her heel into the mattress as she arched her back, "_Jerry..._" His hand moved lower, caressing her thigh, before his fingers trailed up her inner thigh and over damp cotton, she emitting a strangled gasp.

"_I love you, Libby,_" he breathed against her breast, his fingers still teasing her through cotton.

She panted, letting out a soft squeal when his fingers nudged the cotton out of the way, he slipping a digit into her as the other teased her clit. "_Oh, g- oh- ooo... Jerry- pl- please..._" He kissed her again, she moaning fully into his mouth and splaying her legs open.

"Poor Libs," he teased, smiling against her mouth, "just doesn't get this kind of attention at home... This is just a Berkson & Berkson contractual obligation. My thanks to the _best assistant ever _and the _love _of my life."

"_Shut up,_" she managed, her scolding losing weight as she moaned again, rocking her hips back against his hand as he added a second finger. "_Yes-yes-yes-yes- ohh..._"

He kissed her neck again, obediently saying nothing... for a while. "Well, I have so much _time_ to make up for. Four and a half weeks is a long time." She moaned, gripping the bedsheets. "Especially when we're so used to seeing each other six days a week."

She arched her back, letting out a high-pitched whimper and trying to close her thighs, "_Oh... God, yes... pl- yes- Jerry- ohh.._"

"You were always better at numbers than me, Libs. What's that? Used to go at it twice a day, six days a week. So twelve times a week multiplied by the four and a half you were gone." She yelped, nearly climaxing, when he tilted his wrist and rubbed more fiercely as he moved his fingers inside her. "That's... what? Forty-eight and another six is... Fifty-four orgasms I have to make up for."

She whimpered, bucking her hips up and choking out a moan as she switched to digging her fingers into him, "_Ohh... ohh! Jer- Oh, Jer- Jer!_"

"Plus my appreciation for carrying my child. That's gotta be at _least_ another thirty. And you're _so stressed_ at home. So that's another twenty," he told her seriously, flicking his wrist again and earning a throaty gasp and nails bruising his side. "So that's gotta be over a hundred. And you don't get to pitch in for fifty of them. You have to sit back and _relax_ while I make up the time." She inhaled, her mouth moving without words as she started trembling. "How's that sound, beautiful?"

"_Jerry!_" she climaxed around his fingers, panting hard and clawing at him.

"_Shh, shh, shh,_" he soothed, kissing her mouth again. "Breathe, sweetheart." He brushed her hair out of her face, unclenching her fingers from in his side before sitting back and pulling her bra where the strap was still stuck around one arm. He moved between her open thighs, curling his fingers in the elastic of her underwear and pulling them down her thighs before pressing a kiss to her calf, "Relax, hunny."

She exhaled shakily before holding her breath altogether as he continued kissing up her calf. And then her thigh, ghosting light kisses between her legs that made her whimper, before kissing down her other leg. His hands smoothed hotly along her thighs, he holding her legs open, as he leaned down to run his tongue along her. She tensed her muscles in anticipation, reaching down to comb her fingers through his hair before fisting them in his hair when he licked again. "_Ohh..._"

He smiled, pressing an open-mouthed kiss there and sucking teasingly, "Libs, you're so _tense_. You're supposed to be relaxing." He moved his mouth up, kissing the slight swell of her stomach before she impatiently wriggled beneath him, worming up on the bed and trying to force his head lower. "Libs, Libs... _Relax_, remember? You're _relaxing_."

"_Lower- lower- lower,_" she whined, rocking her hips up.

"Here?" he teased, kissing above her knee.

"_Jer_," she complained, tugging at his hair.

He breathed a laugh, smoothing his hand along her thigh, "I know, beautiful. You don't get this treatment at home."

She tightened her fingers in his hair, tugging his head forcefully up to hers, "_Enough about home, Jer. I wanna focus on being with you here and now._"

"You wanna focus on what you want me to _do_ here and now," he corrected, chuckling.

"_N-mm_," she shook her head, kissing him, "_I love you, Jer._"

"_I love you, Libs,_" he breathed, returning the kiss. "_But you're still supposed to be relaxing_."

She whined softly, sitting up when he started to pull away. She tugged at his his tie, using the leverage to pull his mouth back to hers even as she started to unknot it. That obstacle gone, her fingers found his collar, popping the top buttons open before untucking his shirt and tugging it over his head. Smoothing a hand along his skin, she sighed contently against his mouth, "_I missed you so much_."

Smiling, he kissed her again, "_You're radiant. Pregnancy agrees with you, Libs._" She kissed him hard again, pushing him to his back even as she started yanking at his belt. He chuckled, pushing her hair back, "Relax, beautiful. We have time."

"Never as much as we think," she reminded, focusing on his belt and finally managing to unhook it before pulling it from the loops and tossing it behind herself. "Do you realize it'd been four and a half weeks since I touched you? _Kissed_ you? Made love to you?"

He growled lowly, kissing her hard and pushing her to her back again to answer her question. He slid his fingers into her again, her own stilling from where she'd been clawing at his zipper. "_It's been as long since I tasted you,_" he reminded.

She tilted her head, trying to kiss him and mewling when he teasingly pulled his head back, "_Stop it._"

"_Cause it's been as long since you'd had an orgasm?_" he guessed, smirking as he moved his fingers again. He kicked his socks off before kissing her neck lightly, she going silent. "_If you'd cooperate, I could start to make up for lost time._"

"_I'm- I can- I -_" she nodded breathlessly, releasing her grip on his pants.

And then he was moving down her body again, pressing light kisses to her breasts and their baby. And then lower, and it was impossible for her to be silent, small groans being teased out of her by teasing kisses and swipes of his tongue along fevered flesh.

"_Jerry,_" she mewled, spreading her legs for him as he moved between them, his tongue seeming too hot and too cold all at once. He smoothed his hands along her thighs, she letting out another small moan as he continued teasing her with his lips and tongue. She swallowed thickly, nodding and moaning softly, "_Mmm... mmhmm.. Y-yes..._"

He breathed a laugh before starting to trace letters with his tongue. 'E' 'L' 'I' 'Z' 'A' 'B'

She moaned loudly, gripping the pillow under her head and bucking her hips, "_Oh, Jesus... Oh, G- uh-huh. Ple- oh!_" He continued, affectionately stroking her thigh as his tongue continued writing letters. 'E' 'T' 'H' 'B' 'E'

"_Oh!_" she groaned, panting hard between low croons. She moved a trembling hand to his hair, fisting her fingers and half fighting him, wordlessly telling him she was getting close. "_Jer-Jer-Jer- oh, God... y- oh, God... Stop- t-too much... Oh, God... S-so... ohhhh..._" She panted thickly, her moans thick and sounding endless, one leading into the other with small gasps of breath punctuating each as she arched.

'R' 'K' 'S'

"_Jerr- ooohhh..._" she writhed, trying to close her thighs as she trembled desperately. "_Pl-c-can't... I c- too- oh, God... J-Jerry..._"

'O'

She gasped sharply before panting and arching. "_R-right- Jerry- oh, Go- y-yes- oh- ohh..._"

'N'

"_J-oh-oohh!_" she wailed, climaxing with a shudder as she clutched the pillow by her head with one hand, the other's fingers still plunged in his hair.

He smiled against her before kissing back up her body and laying beside her. "_I love you. I'm so grateful to you. I wouldn't want to have a baby with anyone else,_" he told her tenderly, kissing her neck and face as she panted.

Her eyelids flickered but stayed closed, she rolling closer before clutching him, "_I love you. _I- I know it's not _ideal_ circumstances, but I _am_ glad I'm having your baby."

He kissed her, nudging her to her back and leaning over her, "_I'm so glad to hear you say that_."

"_Take your pants off,_" she murmured, digging her fingers into his back.

"I'm beginning to think you only want me for one reason," he teased, smiling as he brushed his nose against hers.

She kissed him again, "I do. _To love_."

He shifted above her, freeing a hand to caress her cheek, "That's a good reason."

She tugged him closer, gazing up at him and playing with his hair, "I love you, Jer."

"_Oh, Libs_," he murmured, kissing her again. "_I love you too. You're the most important thing in the world to me._"

She smiled, brushing her nose against his. "_Can't say that anymore_," she chimed.

"Wh- _oh,_" he kissed her chastely, understanding. "Well, right now you're carrying him, so you're _doubly_ important."

"Good save," she drawled before giggling and kissing him again.

He moved off of her, she mewling and reaching for him, before digging in the nightstand, "I have something for you."

She chuckled, pressing up on her knees and curling her arms around his neck as she knelt behind him. "_I'll bet you do_," she kissed his neck before smoothing her hands down his chest and pulling at his zipper.

"Libs," he smiled, turning his head to kiss her, "That's _not_ what I meant."

She gasped when he held a small velvet box up, snatching it and falling back against the pillows. "You knew I was pregnant?" she demanded.

He moved beside her, kissing her neck as she turned the box over in her small hands, "No."

"What's this for?" she asked, running her fingernail along the crease in the velvet where it opened. "Is it a ring? You know I can't leave Drew."

"Just _open_ it," he laughed.

She cracked it open, inhaling and running a finger over the earrings, "They're _beautiful_." Diamond cluster square earrings. "... I've never- they're _so beautiful_."

He kissed her neck again before turning her head to his with a light grip on her chin, "_Happy birthday, love of my life_."

"But it's not-" she started before he kissed her again.

"But it _was_," he reminded. "But you quit two days before. I've been waiting since then to give them to you."

"I- I can't take these," she shook her head, trying to push the box back at him. "It's too much."

He didn't let her, refusing to take them, "Why?"

She sniffed, raising a hand to wipe her eyes, "It's too much, Jer. I can't take it."

"_Why_?" he repeated, taking her hand and kissing it. "Drew won't recognize that they're new. They're- antiquey."

"Jer-"

"_Please?_" he kissed her hand again. "You won't let me take you away from him. And you won't let me be physically supportive during your pregnancy. You won't let me buy you a ring or take you to a fancy dinner or the theatre, that I _know _you miss. At _least_ let me give you these. At least wear them for me?"

She inhaled, closing her eyes, before nodding. "... they're too much, though, Jer."

He smiled, arguing, "You _promised_. Besides, they're not too much. They're not nearly enough. You're beautiful and I don't get to spoil you nearly enough. I get, what? Two days a year: your birthday and Christmas."

"You're Jewish," she reminded, breathing a laugh before sniffing again. "You had nine."

"Alright, so I abused the eight days of gifts. Sue me. I hated my ex-wife and I finally have someone I _like_ lavishing with gifts," he curled an arm around her. "And now I get Mother's Day. You're gonna raise the kid Catholic, right? So I can do Easter gifts too. And if I'm gettin' one for him, I'll just get one for you. Plus Christmas, cause I don't wanna confuse him. Badda-bing: twelve."

She laughed, kissing him, reminding, "_And Valentine's Day._"

He smiled, affectionately running his fingers through her hair and teasing, "Now you're just getting greedy."

She nudged him, "Oh, stop. Who said I meant you had to get _me_ something. I like giving you things too."

"You like giving me one very _specific_ thing," he accused, smiling.

"Jerry!" she gasped, laughing as she nudged him again before setting the earrings to the side on the bed. "You're terrible. … C'mere."

He smiled, leaning over her as she rolled to her back, "_Is it Christmas already? I may have to convert._"

She curled her arms around him, dragging his mouth to hers, "_But then we lose Hanukah._" She kissed him hard, closing her eyes.

"And, as a Jew, we do have all kinds of extra holidays," he agreed, switching to her neck as she lowered her hands to start pushing at his waistband.

"_Mmm.. Jer,_" she breathed before pushing his pants and boxers from his hips and below his ass. He obediently removed them the rest of the way before moving between her legs and leaning down to kiss her again. "_I love you_."

He kissed her forehead and along her cheek before kissing her mouth again as he slid into her, "_I love you, Libs_."

She groaned softly, raising her knees on either side of his hips before running her palm down his back, "_Oh, Jer_..."

He kissed her neck again, teasing soft coos out of her, as they rocked together, she worming one leg around his waist.

"_You're the best thing that ever happened to me,_" he breathed, moving an arm under her when she arched her back.

She dug her nails into his back, raking him, before running her fingers along his bicep, "_Oh, Jerry.. I love you so much.. oohh, Jerry..._"

He trailed messy kisses along her neck before starting to kiss down to her breasts, "Libs... You're so beautiful.."

She gripped his hair, bringing his mouth to hers, "Not my breasts."

"Wh-"

"Not after I climaxed when I'm pregnant. They get tender and sore," she explained, kissing him again.

He smiled, "... My first pregnancy rule."

She curled her other leg around him, "The first of many, I assure you."

"When does the one where I get to _spoil_ you come?" he teased, kissing her neck again.

"Sometime around week thirty," she smirked before exhaling and closing her eyes as he reached between them to tease her clit. "Y- you gettin' close already, Jer?"

Conceding to his better judgment, he moved his mouth again before he could leave a mark. "I just made the beautiful woman carrying my child climax twice after not seeing her for _far_ too long."

She groaned, arching again as she chewed her lip, "_... that sounds like a yes._"

"_Oh, Libs..._"

"_There!_" she nodded suddenly, whimpering breathlessly and digging her nails into him. "_Ooh... yes-yes-yes-yes! Jerry, darling... ohh.._"

He moaned against her neck before kissing her again, "_I love you._"

She crowed desperately, kissing him hard before tilting her head back and panting. "_I love you-I love you-I love you-_"

* * *

><p>"<em>Ohh..<em>" he grunted, rolling off of her and back onto his side of the bed as she stared at the ceiling of their bedroom.

… She hated when he slept naked afterwards. He always wound up half on her side, sticky and sweaty and … _poking_ her in the middle of the night. And if he was naked, he expected her to sleep naked too... and then he groped her too. 'In his sleep.'

And honestly, besides all of that, they had kids. What if Corky ran in? He was naked and, if he had his druthers, _she'd_ be naked and they wouldn't be able to react to an emergency. It wasn't good parenting skills, frankly. Not with their family.

Exhaling, she pushed the sheets off herself, grabbing her underwear and nightgown before dropping them in the hamper and scooping up her robe.

"Where ya goin'?" he murmured, rolling onto his back to address her.

He wasn't even covered by the sheet. _Un_savorable.

"I think I'm gettin' a hot flash. I'm gonna get a quick shower," she excused, shrugging her robe on and tying the sash.

… And then sleep on the couch downstairs and away from his midnight ministrations.

"Okay," he rolled back over. "Alarm's set for five and then I gotta go to the restaurant. You're comin' in, right?"

No. She wanted to see Jerry again. She wanted- "Of course," she forced a smile even though he wasn't looking. She had to make him think they were okay. That meant some sacrifice. "Probably not so early, though, if that's okay."

He nodded vaguely, "As long as I got ya for the lunch rush."

"You will," she breathed, unlocking the bedroom door and creeping out into the hall before closing the door behind herself.

She passed the bathroom, though, sneaking downstairs and to the phone in the kitchen.

"'Ullo?"

"Jerry?" she whispered, "It's me. … I- I needed to hear your voice."

Suddenly, he didn't sound tired anymore, "What's wrong? Did he hurt you? Do you want me to come over? I can be there in ten minutes." She heard a flurry of motion on his end.

Smiling, she sat at the table, shaking her head as she raised her free hand to her ear to play with one of the earrings he'd gotten her, "No, hunny. .. I just miss you. … I'm clingy when … you know. Another rule."

"Another pregnancy rule," the commotion stopped and she could hear a smile in his voice.

"That makes two," she smiled, slipping a hand under her robe to run her thumb over her abdomen.


	2. Chapter 2

"When are you coming _back_?" he asked again

She shrugged, "Drew's still... _suspicious_." She leaned against him, guiding his hand to her stomach to pet the baby.

Jerry let out a noise, pausing the movie, clearly intent on getting a set date. "Of course he is. But you promised to come back, Libs."

"I _can't_," she complained. "He... I don't think it's helped that I pulled away physically again. … I just _hate_ … _touching_ him." She shivered. "And... ugh. He's so.. He's a _pig_. And he _touches_ me and expects me to warm to him and kiss him and _touch-_"

She gagged in the back of her throat and Jerry smiled, thinking she was dramatizing, until she pushed his arm away from her, running for his bathroom.

He followed, pulling her hair away from her face and petting her back as she retched. "Oh, Libs... I'm sorry, hunny. I thought- well, I'm sorry."

She shook her head, reaching and flushing the toilet before accepting his help in standing. Brushing her teeth, she watched their reflections before spitting, offering, "Not your fault."

"I wanna _help_," he reminded.

"He.. is very suspicious. I can't come back to work just yet," she repeated. She rinsed her mouth before letting him lead her back to the couch. "Let's just watch the movie, huh? I'm due back at the restaurant at two and _you_ have to get back to the office."

He nodded, kissing her shoulder and curling an arm around her again, "Okay, Libs. Whatever you want."

* * *

><p>"Jerry!"<p>

He blinked for a minute, his phone to his ear. He'd barely answered it. How was he in trouble already? … Pregnancy. Man, was it kickin' his ass.

"Li- Wh- One second. Yeah, thank you. Goodbye. Close the door on your way out." He waved a hand at the artist, the other covering the receiver, "I'll call you. Don't call me." He waited until the artist left, closing the door as instructed, before returning to the call. "Libs? Yeah, what is it?"

"_Why are you ignoring me?_" she started crying on the other end.

He bit his lip, covering the receiver as he let out a sigh.

… Yeah. This pregnancy was kickin' his ass. He was wrong seventy percent of the time. And the other thirty was spent complaining about Drew. After their physical, loving reunion, she seemed to have lost most interest in sex, often pushing him away and running to the bathroom in the middle – seemed the morning sickness was kickin' _her_ ass since it lasted _all day_. So he'd stopped trying. Which got him tearfully accused of not being interested in her because she was fat. So he'd tried to romance her again, getting an expensive dinner delivered – she'd vomited that up – before trying to make love to her. She'd yelled at him that she wasn't a doll and couldn't turn it on or off. Since then, he'd been physically affectionate – kissing, hugging, cuddling – more than ever, but firmly made sure he never started sex unless she started moaning while kissing. … Which wasn't often. But it was … some degree of balanced. And it worked well enough.

Even though he was going half mad with not being able to touch her. She was more beautiful than ever, with her healthy glow and rounding stomach and fuller breasts. And he couldn't touch her because it just made her cry.

"I'm not, sweetheart," he promised. "I assumed this would be a private phone call, so I had to send out the artist. Uh... Bennings, I think it was."

"... That new young one you hired?" she sniffed suspiciously. "With the long legs."

He closed his eyes – he'd brought this on himself, he couldn't blame her when _he'd_ brought up the young artist. "... Yes." He could practically _hear_ her contemplate hanging up. "But I love _you_, Libs. You know that. I don't _want_ someone else. I want to be with you." And make love. All night. "And cuddle! And pet our baby."

She exhaled into the phone, "Fine."

He licked his lips, taking what he could get, "... Sweetheart, what is it? What's wrong? Did you want to leave now for lunch? Or do you know what you want me to pick up?"

"No. I-"

She started crying again and he sat up stiffly in his chair, "What's wrong? Is it Drew? Did he hurt you? Did he hurt the baby? Do you need me to come get you? Where are you? I'll leave now."

"No!" she yelled, stopping him. "I'm fine. The baby's fine. Everyone's fine."

"Then _what_?" he pleaded. "You sound upset, Libs."

She sniffed again, "I'm going to _Hawaii!_"

This was bad?

"... Oh," he returned, trying to sound disappointed. "... And you don't want to be on the beach in a maternity swimsuit?"

She cried loudly again before evidently deciding to hang up on him, the line going dead.

… _Man_, this pregnancy was kickin' his ass.

* * *

><p>He went home for lunch, as per their agreement, though he doubted she'd show.<p>

But there she was, her feet crossed at the ankle on his coffee table as she munched on popcorn.

He set the Chinese down on the table in front of her, taking his usual spot beside her. "... I'm sorry about earlier," he tried. "You're right. Hawaii is..." He struggled for a word, still unsure of what reaction he was supposed to have. But she supplied it for him, raising a hand and crying.

"_A place I'll never see! I'll never dip my toes in the ocean or- or hear Don Ho sing!_"

He blinked, "But you said you were going."

"Who were we _kidding!?_ Drew and I can't afford to shut the restaurant down for ten whole days! They'd foreclose the house! And-and Corky needs so much help at school!" she shook her head, turning and crying into his shirt. "_We can't go!_"

Privately, he was rather glad she wasn't going with _Drew_. The man was a pig. And he didn't want to think about her and her husband in some king-sized bed. … Even if she didn't want to, she'd go through with being intimate with him to keep him calm and happy. And he hated the thought of it. At least at home, Drew came back from the restaurant worn out and too tired to push sex. In Hawaii, he wouldn't be tired. He'd... be served champagne and strawberries. And would try to seduce her. And she'd give in... for the kids – he _had_ to tell himself it was for the kids. If she really wanted Drew, she wouldn't keep coming to him.

"_I'll take you one day,_" he promised, curling his arms around her. "We'll call it some business thing and I'll take you. And you can swim in the Pacific. In a gorgeous bathing suit. And we'll go hear Don Ho sing. And I'll feed you strawberries. I promise."

She shook her head, "_No you won't! You'll-_" She cried harder, fisting her fingers in his shirt, "_You'll leave me cause I can't leave Drew! And you'll hate me!_"

He kissed her head, "_No_. That will _never_ happen. I'm here, Libs. I'm here for the long haul. Forever. I'll be here... regardless of if you leave Drew. And if you do, I'll be here to propose and marry you and take care of you and the kids. C'mon, sweetheart. No more tears. Our baby's hungry. So why don't we cuddle and you can feed him _and_ you. And we'll watch a movie."

"... _Okay_," she nodded reluctantly. "... You really promise you'll take me to Hawaii?"

"Cross my heart," he cooed, pulling the bag closer before handing her her combination platter. "Do you want your eggroll now?"

She shook her head. "After. Did you get forks? And duck sauce?"

And just like that, they were back in their usual schedule. … For the moment.

* * *

><p>He sat up, groaning, as he answered the phone, "Yeah, hello?" He blinked, still half-asleep.<p>

And then he was _fully awake_, the crying on the other end of the line alerting him.

"Libs? Libs, what's wrong?"

"_We're going!_" she cried.

Going where?

Oh, Hawaii.

… Oh. With Drew.

"But I thought you couldn't. Cause-" He wasn't awake enough to remember the reasons she'd given before, fumbling, "Uhm... Corky! Corky's schooling and the... restaurant?"

She sniffed, "_He's getting his brother to run the restaurant and he's getting the homework from Corky's tutors!_"

Oh. … Then Drew had figured it out, was dragging his Libs to Hawaii to... have his way with her on sandy beaches. And he couldn't stop it. … Maybe he was jumping to conclusions, though. Maybe Drew wouldn't push it. Maybe he... just wanted a vacation from the restaurant.

He froze when she spoke again.

"_He's calling it our honeymoon!_"

He'd _kill_ the bastard. Calling it their _honeymoon_? Firstly, he was using some... _free trip_ to take Libby on a honeymoon _twenty some years late_. Secondly... with a monicker like that, he was certainly planning to be intimate. If he wasn't, he'd call it a vacation. He was going to use _Corky's_ trip to bed Libby. _His Libs_.

She sniffed, "_And- and the WORST part is I won't SEE you for ten days!_"

… And he couldn't get her out of it. Unless she planned to leave Drew, she couldn't turn down a free _honeymoon_ to Hawaii. He'd be so suspicious.

"... When do you leave?" he breathed.

"A c-couple of _days!_" she started sobbing on the other end, he aching to hold her. "I-I tried to talk him out of it. I told him I didn't want _Richard_ to run the restaurant. But he said he's _family!_" She was nearly growling now and he was privately worried she'd wake Drew. … She was _presumably_ somewhere in the house. .. And not quiet. Which, while often a turn-on, was not conducive to illicit late night phone calls to facilitate an affair.

He closed his eyes, knowing even as he did it that it'd get him yelled at, "_Shh, Libs. Calm down. Drew will hear_."

She nearly shrieked, as... predicted. "_Hear!? The man... exhausted himself taking me after he'd decided we were going on our damn honeymoon!_"

He let out a growl of his own, sitting up, "He forced you? I'll be right there. I'll- Libs, I'll take you away from him. You don't have to stay. Husbands _can_ rape their wives. They're.. they're trying cases. There's recognition. We'll get him arrested."

"We _can't!_" she cried, reminding, "_Corky!_"

He nodded reluctantly, "... Okay. I- … I don't know, Libs. I don't know what to do. … I'll miss you."

She cried harder, "_I don't wanna leave you!_"

"Shh, sweetheart. You're not leaving yet. I will see you tomorrow, right? For lunch?" he reminded, trying to sound cheerful.

"I don't know," she admitted. "W-we have to pack."

He exhaled, "... Call me? Let me know? And, uh... Libby, w-will you call me while you're there?"

"Of _course_ I will!" She was crying again. She made a wet kissing noise into the phone, "I l-love you!"

"I love you too," he promised. "Goodnight."

"Goodnight."

He heard the click, telling him she'd hung up, he unable to keep back a soft, "_Be safe._"

* * *

><p>It was... just after three in the afternoon. He wasn't sure about the time difference, but he was sure that Drew had to be around. And she was going to get herself <em>in trouble<em>. And this wasn't like when he could drive across Glen Brook. She was _in Hawaii_.

"Libs, Libs, _Libs_," he soothed. "Hunny, calm down. What is it? Where's Drew?" She'd called and just started crying about geckos and luggage.

"_He's trying to get us a flight back! He-he's on another pay phone!_" she cried.

He nodded, "Okay, hunny. Now tell me what's wrong, hmm?"

But he'd opened a can of worms and now she was crying louder. And he was _sure_ her kids would notice. Or Drew. "_It's not first class at all! Th-there was no limo and no leis and the airline smashed our luggage and then Earl lost it and then they gave us a cr-crummy room and there are lizards all over the walls!_"

He blinked, trying to absorb the information. "... Like wallpaper?"

"_No!_" she yelled, clearly impatient. .. Though, understandably. From the sounds of it, it was a rough day for anyone, let alone his poor pregnant lover. "_They're REAL! They move and they come off the wall and they're everywhere!_"

"Oh, Libs," he sighed, trying to think of something. … Maybe he could have money wired to them. He'd given her one of his credit cards for emergencies and alerted the company 'he' was going to Hawaii so they wouldn't shut it off. And, conveniently, because she'd been his assistant for so long, she was legally allowed to sign. Though some stores may question it and ask for I.D. And then he'd get a call. But he could smooth that over. He'd rather she had it. … But he doubted Drew wouldn't notice if she sprung for a proper hotel. Or bought seats back.

She sniffed, continuing, "_And I haven't eaten since breakfast!_"

… And she did tend to get cranky when meal times were postponed. .. Even _before_ she'd gotten pregnant.

"Well, hunny, why don't you eat?" he suggested gently.

She whined, arguing, "We _can't_ until Drew finds out about the seats back!"

"What about your purse? Don't you have snacks or something in there?" he tried.

"I can't _eat_ in front of the kids if I don't have enough to share!" she practically yelled.

He exhaled, nodding, "Of course. I'm sorry. L-"

"_I have to go,_" she hissed, the click telling him she'd hung up.

"-ibs. .. Love you too," he smiled thinly, replacing the phone in its cradle.

He couldn't keep up with this pregnancy. But they were coming home. It'd be fine. He'd see her.. probably tomorrow. For lunch. And he's rub her tired feet and kiss her brow. And get her to _calm down_.

Just... what was it? Seven more months?

Oy.

* * *

><p>"Hello?" he blinked wearily as he answered the phone. … It was Libby. It had to be. She was calling to say they'd landed safely.<p>

"_We're staying!_" she cried.

He sat upright, "What?"

She started speaking very quickly between sniffles, "We tried to make Corky feel better and decided we'd stay and rent cheap motel-" He didn't want _his Libby_ and their _baby_ in a cheap motel! "-and use the vouchers for food and clothes and everything and then we went to see Don Ho and our vouchers were expired but then Corky met him outside and he got us in and then Mr. Ho said we could stay at his fancy new luxury hotel for free because he felt so bad for us and the new hotel is gonna be perfect and wonderful and there'll be room service and a nice pool and fancy, wonderful dinners and cushy, plush beds and everything's perfect!"

… Oh. That wasn't so bad.

"That's... good?" he tried. She wailed in response, telling him he'd guessed incorrectly. Again. He could not _keep up_ with this pregnancy. "_Shh,_" he soothed. "I'm sorry, Libs. I'm sorry! It's bad. It's very very bad. It's terrible. The worst."

"It's _perfect!_" she cried loudly.

… What in the hell was he supposed to do with that? Was that a joke? Was this a prank? Was she even in Hawaii? Was she going to burst into his apartment, laughing at his confusion?

It's perfect but she's crying. It's terrible and she's crying. Weren't pregnant women supposed to glow and be jolly? All Libby did was cry and make him feel guilty for reasons neither of them could seem to figure out.

"... I'm sorry?" he repeated.

"It's the nicest, most perfect honeymoon ever and it's not with _you!_" she sobbed.

Oh. She missed him. And didn't want to share the experience with Drew. … Now he understood. She'd been clingy since she'd gotten pregnant and had complained about Drew almost since she'd started as his assistant.

He leaned back against the pillows, "Oh, sweetie... I'll take you on a nice trip. I promise. And... Don't think of it as a honeymoon. Think of it as a vacation. With the kids. You never get to see Corky and Becca enough, right? Spend the time with them. And spend the time being pampered the way you don't get to at home."

"... Don't you _miss_ me?!" she demanded, squawking. "Why aren't you upset we're not coming home!? Don't you want me to come home, Jer? You're so insensitive! _God!_"

"Libby, sweetie, please calm down. That's not true. I love you. I'm missing you terribly. I can't wait until you come home to me so I can kiss you and pet the baby and rub your feet and your back and get you whatever you're craving and tell you how beautiful you are," he rambled, hoping some piece of the truth would worm its way past her ire and soothe her anger.

She exhaled in his ear in a huff, "... I don't know if I believe you. I have to go back to our cheap motel room. I said I was getting ice. I can't be gone too long."

He clutched the phone, trying again, "Okay. I love you and the baby very very much and I miss you both. But you have fun and relax for me. Get an extra massage and tan at the pool."

"... Relax for _you_?" she echoed – and he knew he'd said something wrong. "Because it's so _stressful_ for you and your body right now? Let me tell you about _my_ body, Jerry! Let me tell you about this heat and how much _weight_ I've gained! Let me tell you about how _sick_ I feel and about how I can't wear anything revealing or they might notice I'm pregnant!" she squawked.

"No, no. Of course you need to relax for you. I was teasing," he promised.

"_This is a joke to you!?_" she screeched.

He closed his eyes, "_No_. Love, you're taking this the wrong way. I just meant that you need to relax and take advantage of not having to work or take care of a house or anything. You can just read those books you never have time for. And tan by the pool – I know how much you love the water and the beach. And the pregnancy _has_ been hard on you. So you should get a nice massage, sweetie."

"_I can't lay on my stomach on the table!_" she reminded, snapping.

He gritted his teeth before exhaling, "... Maybe you can ask them to give you a prenatal massage and not... record it that way. So Drew won't know. They're supposed to be very good for the baby. I was doing some research-"

But again he was wrong, she interrupting, "What am I to you? An oven? You want me to get a massage cause it's good for the baby!?"

"And you," he added. "It's supposed to be good for both of you. It relaxes you and works the muscles that the tension is drawn to and your relaxation helps the baby. Sweetheart, I love you whether or not you're having my baby. But since you are and you said your back and feet have been hurting, why not take advantage of your relaxation vacation?"

She sighed in his ear before agreeing, "... I suppose I could maybe do that."

He smiled, relieved, "Good. Whatever you want to do for you. I love you very very much, love. You and the baby. And I miss you both."

"... We love you too," she returned after a beat. "But I have to go. I'll check in later."

She hung up without waiting for his response and he dropped the phone before rolling onto his stomach as he groaned.

… This pregnancy was going to be the death of him.

* * *

><p>He shooed the artist out of his office before sitting on the edge of his desk as he answered the phone, "Hello and thank you for calling B-"<p>

"Jer!"

"Libs?" he deflated before rounding his desk and sitting down. … He _had_ been looking forward to another call from her – he preferred she check in regularly what with Drew – but he'd been waiting on another call from a client.

"... You're not happy it's me," she accused, reading his voice. … which wasn't fair since she was so hard to read over the phone while pregnant.

He shook his head, "Yes I am, hun. Of course I am."

She whined, "No you're not! Jer! Why don't you care!? I wanted to call and tell you all about the hotel and how nice it is and you don't even care!"

"Yes I do," he promised. "I care a lot. Tell me al-" He groaned when she hung up. "… Damn it." He let out a sigh, jumping when the phone rang again. He picked it up, starting immediately, "I care deeply, Libs. You know I do! Tell me all about your fancy hotel and your massage and the pool."

"... Mr. Berkson?"

He gripped the phone, biting back a sigh, "Mr. Kolter. Yes. Sorry about that."

The man on the other end laughed, "Trouble with the missus?"

"Trouble with the girlfriend, yes," he confirmed. "But I apologize. Thank you for calling, Mr. Kolter. Can I call you Tim? Tim, let's talk about your vision and what we at Berkson & Berkson can do to make it a reality."

… He'd kill Libby. Well, of course he wouldn't. But she was affecting the company and his professionalism now with her mood swings. They needed to talk about this. Maybe... Only call during lunch or after work except in the case of emergencies.

* * *

><p>"Libs," he started hesitantly, "... Do you think... maybe we can map out times to call?"<p>

"... Why?" she demanded, her voice flat on the other end where she'd been gushing a moment ago about the fabulous pool.

He chewed his lip, "Well, I mean... it just might be nice. Don't you think? So I … have an idea of when you're going to call And I can clear my mind of any distractions."

Her irritation was nearly palpable. "... Why would you be _distracted_ when I'm calling you, Jerry?"

"Just.. sometimes at work, we get a little backed up. Stella is... not exactly the best assistant. And she's not organized," he explained, trying to come up with a plausible excuse.

She clucked her tongue, "_Why_ would you have hired an assistant who's disorganized, Jerry?"

… Shit. It was never a good sign when she used his name repeatedly. That was never good.

"I- I didn't think I'd have to keep her for long," he laughed awkwardly. "Have I mentioned I miss you?"

"... You hired her because she's young and has perky breasts. Didn't you, Jer?" she accused, sounding angry now. "Because you want to sleep with her."

He shook his head, "No. Hunny, n-"

"_Because you hate me!_" she started crying on the other end.

He bit back a sigh, closing his eyes, "_No_, Libby. I don't hate you. I love you. You know that, sweetheart. I just thought it might be … _easier_ for me to focus on you and all your delightful stories if you only call during lunch or after work."

"_You don't care anymore!_" she argued, still crying. "_You used to be worried about Drew and now you don't care cause you love Stella!_"

"No, Libs. That's not true. I love _you_. Only you," he soothed.

She let out a squawk on the other end, demanding, "_What about our baby!?_"

He winced, nodding, "Yes. Of course. And the baby. You and the baby. Only both of you."

"_What about my kids!? You say you want me to leave Drew but you don't even love my kids! How can I leave them without a father!?_" she cried.

… This was ridiculous. She'd already told him she _wasn't_ leaving Drew. But now he had to be ready to be a father to two teenagers he barely knew even though he'd never be asked to _actually_ step up. … Fatherhood was becoming increasingly unfair. Not that he _wouldn't_ step up. He'd love to. He'd _love_ to whisk her away from that pig Drew.

"... And the kids. I love Corky and Becca and Paige too. You and the baby and Corky and Becca and Paige," he agreed.

She sniffed, "And Arnold?"

Who the hell was Ar- The dog. Right. … She didn't know he was allergic. Eh. Hardly mattered. By the time she left Drew, the dog would probably be dead. They only lived... what? Fifteen years? And the dog had to be at least twelve.

"Yes. And Arnold," he echoed.

She exhaled, "... Good. Then why can't I call?"

He shrugged, giving up, "You can, love. Any time you want. I love hearing from you. I'm glad you're getting this little vacation, but I miss you so much. Tell me more about your day. You already told me about the pool. What about that buffet you mentioned? I bet the baby loved that."

"_Well_," she started, the smile in her voice making the minor headache and _huge_ confusion of their small argument worth it, "it had fruit and burgers and kabobs with chicken and peppers and onions. _Oh,_ Jer, it was to die for. I've never tasted food so good."

"Well, you just soak it up. And know that I miss you, darling," he returned.

He could hear the smile in her voice, "I miss you too!"


	3. Chapter 3

She breathed easily, absently petting her bare stomach as she leaned back against Jerry on the couch, their empty food containers from the restaurant sitting on his coffee table. "I could get so so used to this," she smiled as he reached to absently pet her stomach as well.

"Hey. You never told me what Drew said when you told him about the baby," he realized, looking at the top of her head.

She breathed a laugh, "I haven't told him yet, silly."

He blinked at her, confused, "You- what?"

"I haven't told him," she repeated, shrugging. "I try to avoid him. I pretend to be asleep when he gets in and sleep when he's getting ready in the mornings."

"But- you haven't t- You don't think he's _noticed_?" he pressed.

She stiffened and he knew he'd said something wrong, "Are you trying to say I'm getting _fat_?"

He shook his head even before she'd turned around, "No! I just... You're _glowing_, my love. You have that glow." … And she _was_ getting a bit far along. Already she was nearly four months. No amount of spinning could make this seem like she was any earlier. As _cute_ as it was, she was _very_ clearly pregnant. He wasn't sure how no one had asked her yet.

"... I don't _wanna_ tell Drew," she whined, leaning back against him again.

".. Hunny, I think you're gonna have to," he smiled.

She sprawled out, sighing, "_Fine_."

"It's for the best," he reminded, grimacing. … He didn't think that. He thought she should _leave_ Drew. Then it wouldn't matter who knew she was pregnant. Or how far along she really was.

But she had to tell Drew she was pregnant before she'd come back.

"I _know_," she groaned, stroking her fingers along her stomach again. She gasped before grabbing his hand and pulling it against her stomach.

"What is it!? What's wrong!?" he demanded before blinking in shock as she giggled, he feeling a small thump against his palm.

"He's kicking!" she crowed.

He nodded, "You _definitely_ have to tell Drew. Tonight."

* * *

><p>She stared at the ceiling and pet her stomach through her nightgown.<p>

Drew was downstairs making the kids breakfast before school. And she... just didn't want to get up. … But she hadn't told Drew the night before, as she'd promised Jerry, so she had to start setting the scene.

… Which shouldn't be _too_ hard. She _was_ starving. … What did they have in the fr- _Lamb_. _Oh,_ they still had lamb in the fridge.

Sure, Drew was cooking breakfast. But.. she didn't _want_ eggs. She wanted that _lamb_ she'd made the night before.

Groaning, she pushed herself out of bed, slipping her feet into her slippers and starting downstairs.

"-family, friends – at the house," Drew decided.

What?

"I already made out the invitations," Corky corrected, brandishing them.

She breezed into the kitchen, "For what?"

"For my birthday, mom," her son answered, she stopping behind him instead.

"_Aww,_" she hugged him, leaning over and curling her arms around his neck as she kissed his cheek, murmuring, "_My baby's turning into a man_." She kissed his cheek again, repeatedly, "_My first baby_." She pressed another loud kiss to his cheek, he laughing, before she exhaled, standing up again and returning her focus to her original task: the _lamb_.

"Hunny, do you remember what we did nineteen years ago?" her husband asked, food in his mouth as he spoke, his voice muffled.

She leaned against the counter, unwrapping the plate of lamb as she reminisced, "Oh, the apartment on Shenadoah. One bedroom. We were terrified. There was a baby on the way and we were broke." She'd picked up a piece of the lamb now, nearly salivating at the scent. … Even_ cold..._ She took a large bite, Drew and Becca both eying her strangely even as she let out a high-pitched laugh and swallowed the bite of lamb. "We used to buy day-old bread. And then the cans – remember the cans!?" Corky was laughing now, he remembering the story probably, but she continued eating as she spoke – ironically a habit she _despised _in Drew, "The market used to sell us cans without labels on it so we didn't know what we were getting for dinner."

"Ya want some mint jelly with that, mom?" Becca asked, her lip still curled in disgust.

She ignored her daughter, looking to her husband instead, "Hunny, what are you doing home?"

"Oh, I just gotta see the kids off on their-" he looked to the kids, changing his tone to tease Becca, "_first day at school_."

Becca sighed, "The condemned ate a hearty meal before walking the last mile."

"I like school," Corky volunteered.

"Speaking of which," Drew brandished his watch in their daughter's direction.

"Oh, daddy, couldn't we just skip a year? Ya know, a sabbatical!" their daughter suggested, nodding encouragingly.

They both looked to her and she laughed as she continued eating.

"Goodbye, hun," her husband started, adding, "You know where I'll be." He turned to the kids adding, "Let's go."

Becca sighed, Corky announcing, "I get to sit in the front, okay, dad?"

"Okay, okay, okay."

… She _hated_ when he talked like that to the kids. _Hated_ it. … It made her think about killing him in his sleep – just reaching over and _smothering_ him with a pillow while he snored. That'd fix all her problems: no more bed hog, no more blanket hog, no more pokes in the middle of the night, no more snoring, no more _Drew_.

He opened the door, the kids grabbing their stuff before starting to follow.

She stopped them, hugging them both to her, "_Oh, my babies_." She kissed Becca's cheek and then Corky's, "Goin' off to high school."

"Ew, mom," Becca started complaining, "you smell like lamb."

… Okay. That was a fair complaint. As long as she wasn't complaining about her doting on them.

She withdrew her hand from her daughter's shoulder, hugging her _first baby_ instead as her husband came back, "Becca. _Charles?_"

Her eyes went wide as she clutched her son, echoing, "Charles?" Her husband rolled his eyes, clearly agreeing, before leaving again, Becca following.

"I'm grown up now, mom," her son explained, she feeling like someone had just poured a bucked of water over her heart. Like _ice_ it was, hearing that.

"Come on, _Charles_," Becca returned, teasing, "Can't keep the hangman waiting." She left again.

She pet his cheek, studying his face. … He'd grown up so well. He'd accomplished more than she'd ever thought possible. She'd been told he might never walk or talk and _here he was_ in front of her, telling her he was – she had to take a deep breath to keep herself composed – _grown up now._

"Bye, mom," he offered, smiling happily.

_Oh, her baby!_

He pulled away, leaving her hand in the air where she'd been petting his cheek, and left, she reluctantly moving forward and closing the door. Leaning against it, she sighed before moving forward and resting her hand on the railing.

She still had to _verbally_ tell Drew, though finally acting the way that seemed natural – she'd done her best the last couple months to suppress any outward symptoms of pregnant – probably would alert her dim-witted husband at least a _little_.

She jumped when the door opened, suddenly afraid she'd verbalized her thoughts and that she was caught.

But it was Becca. "Forgot my notebook," she explained, smiling as she picked it up, adding a "Bye, mom!" before closing the door again.

* * *

><p>"How'd Drew take it?" Jerry pressed when he came home with their lunch.<p>

She licked her lips – she'd tried to decide how to tell him she hadn't told her scumbag husband and decided the _best_ way was to _not say_.

Instead, she shifted on his bed, inhaling and pressing her breasts out as she waited for him to come find her. "In here, love of my life!"

She heard him sigh, "You didn't t- _whoa_."

"_Welcome home, Jer. I was thinking... maybe today we could start with..._" She inhaled, running her hand along her bare side, "_Dessert?_"

He pushed his alarm clock and assorted clutter back on his nightstand, setting the bag down before hurriedly pulling at his belt. Almost frantically, he pushed his pants down, kicking his shoes off, before loosening the knot of his tie and pulling it and his shirt over his head, "Yeah.. Yeah, I like dessert. I could go for some dessert." He tossed his shirt aside before kneeling beside her in bed, leaning down and kissing her.

She chuckled lowly, curling her arms around his neck as she rolled to her back, "_I was hoping you'd agree. _God, what _took _you so long? I'm _so hungry, _Jerry."

He kissed her hard again, his fingers lightly tracing her side before petting her thigh. He slipped his hand between her legs, teasing her through her underwear. "Are you? Well I'm sorry I kept you waiting, Libs. Lemme make it up to you."

"_That sounds like a fair trade_," she agreed, smirking against his lips as she arched. She ran her tongue along her lips, breathing thickly, "_Oh, God. I want you so much, baby_." She groaned into his mouth as he continued teasing her. "_Please_," she whined.

He lightly nipped her lower lip before ignoring her request, only cupping the area between her legs as he started kissing down her neck. She let out another whine, playing into his hand – despite having had the upper hand herself when they'd started – by rocking her hips and grinding against his palm.

"_You're so beautiful,_" he offered softly, kissing along the tops of her breasts before biting her nipple lightly through her bra, she gasping before letting out a groan and rocking her hips against his hand again.

"_St- stop teasing. You're supposed to be making it up to me_," she reminded, breathing thickly.

They were past the morning sickness now, for the most part, and he'd developed the irritating habit of driving her near to the brink with his teasing before finally giving in to her.

"Oh, but you _like_ it," he returned. He moved his hand from between her legs, she letting out a bereft whimper, and placed it on the other side of her body, holding himself off her as he kissed over her stomach. His lips and tongue traced over the swell of her stomach before skirting along the line of her underwear.

She gasped, her head lolling back, when he started kissing her through her underwear, licking and sucking at the fabric as her legs fell open and she writhed.

"Oh- _ohhh_," she exhaled, nodding. "_Yes. Yes, pl- oh... yes._"

He stopped though, moving frustratingly down her thighs instead as he licked and sucked at her still-tan legs. "Oh? Did you like that?" he encouraged, stroking her inner thigh lightly before switching legs and kissing her other thigh. He nipped lightly before sucking hard and she closed her eyes, mewling and wondering how she'd explain a hickie on her thigh to Drew.

But all thoughts of her idiot husband left her mind when Jerry's mouth descended again through the cotton, sucking hard and making her groan loudly as she rocked her hips up.

He reached a hand up, working a clothed breast, and she covered his hand with one of her own, pressing it harder against her plump flesh as she dug her teeth into her lower lip and nodded her encouragement.

And then he maddeningly pulled away, moving back up her body to forage her mouth as he worked his hands between them, pushing her underwear from her hips. She helped, exhaling through her nose as she pushed at the cotton underwear before shimmying out of them and moving her eager fingers to his waistband.

"_Oh, God. I want you more than anything, Jer. T- oh, God, baby. Take me,_" she pleaded, her voice hot against his lips as she shoved at his boxers.

He smiled, kissing her again, before moving down her body – stopping to teasingly bite her through her bra again – and between her legs. He held her thighs apart as he ran his tongue along her, she gasping her pleasure. "_Like this, Libs? Is this what you wanted?_"

She swallowed, whimpering as she gripped his hair with one hand, the other pulling one of his back to her breasts. He gave an indulgent squeeze before obediently squeezing harder as she pressed his hand harder against her breast.

"_Oh- oh!_" she moaned loudly. "_Oh, Jer- Jer! Yes! Oh!_" She threw her head back as his tongue continued flicking deliciously against her before prodding her entrance teasingly. She pulled his mouth higher, back to her clitoris, before letting out a low, keening moan when he focused on it. "_Oh- oh, God- yes! Jer- Jerry! Ohhh!_"

He moved his other hand from her thigh, instead moving his fingers below his mouth and thrusting two digits into her, she squeezing around him as she let out another moan.

"_I love you so much, Libby,_" he told her, speaking against her lowly before resuming his task of alternating hard sucks and rapid flicks of his tongue.

She crowed, starting to shiver, before digging her nails into the hand at her breast, "_Oh- oh, Christ! Ye- oh! Jerry!_"

He nodded once in encouragement, not wanting to stop to speak and ruin the moment, and was rewarded with a loud gasp before she wailed, cumming around his fingers as she surrendered to the pleasure.

Smirking, he moved his head, withdrawing his fingers, "That's my girl. Is that sufficiently made up for?"

"W-_ohh_," she exhaled, her head lolling to one side as she panted, trying to recover. She managed several deep breaths before pushing his boxers down properly and forcing him to his back. She straddled him, his hard length filling her and making her let out another low croon. "_Oh, Jerrry. Oh.. God. I- I want you so much. I love you, my darling_." She kissed his cheeks and mouth before pushing herself back up. She quickly stripped herself of her bra before gripping the headboard as she started moving on him.

"Aren't we aggressive?" he smirked briefly, proud of his momentary win, before closing his eyes and biting his lip as she moved harder. He forced his eyes open, always one to enjoy the sight of her during their love making.

She exhaled, shaking her hair out as she let her head tip back, "_Ohhh.. Oh, Jerry. God, you feel so good. I- I can't- ohhh, Christ._" Surprisingly, she reached, groping her own breasts – she'd told him in no uncertain terms that they were too tender after climaxing while pregnant – before letting out another groan. She fumbled, her own eyes shut, before finding his hand and leading it to her breast. "C-_careful,_" she instructed. "Y-you have to be _gentle_."

Smiling, he leaned up and kissed her breasts lightly – kissing and sucking teasingly and making sure not to graze her with his teeth – as he gently worked her other breast with his hand. "_I love you, Libby_."

"_I love you,_" she returned softly before swallowing and starting to move her hips more ardently against his. "_Ohhh- ahh-ahh-ahhh- Jer-Jerry- ohh- oh!_" She near squeaked when he teasingly pinched her nipple.

"Too much?" he asked, nervous.

But she shook her head, instead kissing him hard as she moved against him, groaning into his mouth.

Emboldened by her response, he repeated the action, tweaking her nipple before moving his other hand to her rear and guiding her movements, encouraging her to move more slowly to better juxtapose the two sensations. She gasped and moaned loudly, but didn't slow her pace. He let out a low chuckle, shaking his head slightly, before rolling them over.

Now in control, he slowed their pace, moving in her purposefully – with deliberate slowness that encouraged him to move deeper and left her panting thickly between moans. His pace now established, he carefully tweaked her nipple again, sucking at her throat at the same time, and she arched, starting to scratch desperately at his shoulder and back.

"_Pl- oh, God. Please, Jerry, baby. I'm so cl-close – yes- yes- oh- ohhh- yeah- mmm_," she managed, her voice low when she managed to force it out between pants and moans.

"Do you want me to do it again?" his own body beginning to tremble as well.

She arched in answer, biting her lip hard in anticipation.

And he nipped lightly at her earlobe, ordering, "_Tell me_."

"_Yes!_" she managed, her voice a breathy cry as she rocked her hips up.

He shifted so his body pressed against hers more as he tried to push deeper _and_ hit her clit before switching and tweaking her _other_ nipple, she letting out a whimpered whine in response as she arched again.

"_So-so-so so close,_" she repeated, panting. "_J-Jerry, please. Please-please-please- ohhh._"

He exhaled, knowing he wouldn't last much longer, before pinching her nipple and immediately moving his hand between them to roughly work her clit.

That worked, sending her over the edge with a shudder and an incomprehensible scream of pleasure as she dragged her nails down his back. Which, in turn, finished him.

He rolled off her before tugging her closer as they clutched each other and panted.

"_I love you so much_," she reminded, her eyes closed.

He panted, looking to her beautiful form, before smirking, accusing, "You didn't tell Drew, did you?"

She whined, weakly hitting him, "_How'd you know?_"

"Libby," he started, sighing, "you _have_ to tell him. You're already feeling the baby kick. How are you going to explain this?"

She ignored him, scooting closer and getting comfy as she laid on her side.

"_Libby_," he repeated.

She opened her eyes, "I can't just... _blurt it out_. I have to... set the scene. Let some of my symptoms leak."

He blinked, drawling, "I'm sure he's noticed."

"I doubt it. He's very dim. But I'm setting the scene. I'm gonna tell him. … Tomorrow night," she claimed.

"_Tonight_," he insisted.

She shook her head,"I have to … lay down hints. This morning I indulged in my pregnancy cravings. In front of everyone. I had lamb – cold lamb – right off the bone. Later I'll throw another symptom in and then I'll tell him tomorrow."

He exhaled,, shaking his head, "... If that's what you think is best. But I want you to _call me_ if he gets wise. I don't want you or the baby in harm's way. Do you understand?"

"Yes, hunny," she agreed, kissing his shoulder and closing her eyes before opening them again, "What'd ya bring for lunch?"

* * *

><p>She sat at her vanity, waiting for him as she scanned the paper. … It was ludicrous if he thought she didn't know he was coming. Not only did he make noise with every heavy step, he <em>reeked<em>. He smelled like the restaurant. It was a damn good thing she was past her morning sickness or she'd have thrown up from the scent.

He came up behind her, dropping a hand to her shoulder and offering softly, "_Hi_."

She forced a smile, reaching up and covering his hand – it was an affectionate gesture and one, admittedly, intended to hopefully mask his smell now that his hands were closer to her nose – with her own. She turned his hand in hers, pressing a light kiss there before deciding to share her enhanced sense of smell since she was sharing symptoms. She sniffed at his hand, telling him, "_Oo,_ you smell like onions."

"Occupational hazard," he excused, smiling in a way she was sure he thought was charming.

… And 'occupational hazard' or not, he could've washed his damn hands before coming in here that way.

Ever since she'd forced herself to be intimate with him so he'd think the baby was his, he'd been pushing more for sex and she – much as she hated him _and_ herself for it – had to agree so he'd believe they were okay and she could return to work for Jerry. But since he was coming in here, she was sure, for sex, he could've at least washed up. _Honestly_. Did he think work stench of grease and onion was a _turn-on_? Please. Even _pregnant_, the scent of food wasn't going to get her motor running.

He shifted, one arm on either side of her, effectively trapping her at the vanity with his bulk if not by force... Not that he'd force himself on her with their bedroom door open. "I remember my grandfather used to come home from his restaurant. And he'd walk in the room," he laughed as he spoke, looking at her in the mirror.

She leaned against one hand as she looked back at his reflection, deep in thought. But he didn't notice, still regaling her with stories of his childhood – were _these_ supposed to turn her on? _How_ did she ever end up married and pregnant with his child?

… Fucking sixties.

See what weed and free love led to?

Oh, if she could go back now and tell herself where she'd be... She wouldn't be here. No. She'd... She'd be on Broadway. And maybe married to Jordan. Or maybe she'd clue herself in on how to still get what she'd wanted. Maybe come to Glenn Brook even as a big, Broadway star. And come sweep Jerry off his feet.

He stroked her arm, jolting her slightly out of her reprieve. And then he took her hand from under her chin, kissing it and continuing as he leaned his head against hers, "-his hands were, uh, garlic and oregano." Was he trying to appeal to the Italian in her? What was he _talking_ about?

He kissed her shoulder through her nightgown, continuing, "His right arm was beef." She kept the same, plastic smile on her face, forcing a closed-mouth giggle as he moved around her to kiss her other shoulder, adding, "His left shoulder was ham." He kissed up by her left ear, hugging her, "And behind his ears, he smelled like sweet wine." He pressed another kiss there.

… What the fuck was that story? Was he talking about his grandfather still? Why did his body parts smell? And _why_ was this supposed to be a turn on?

Drew had _no game_. _How_ had he knocked her up?

He looked to her reflection, she noticing that her own features had fallen from the forced look of happiness. "... Are you happy, Drew?"

… She hadn't _meant_ to say that. It'd just... _slipped_.

"Right now or in general?" he asked, his voice taking on a sleazy cadence as his eyes dropped to her full breasts in their reflections – he was still holding her wrist, the position he was holding her arm in giving him a glimpse she rarely allowed.

… He'd noticed _that_ symptom.

He kissed her neck, not waiting for an answer, and she pressed on, "I'm really asking."

"I don't know," he confessed, his eyes meeting hers briefly in their mirror again as he continued, "... Sometimes. Enough of the times, I guess. I don't really think about it." … He wouldn't. "Are you?"

"I was thinking of going back to school," she revealed. It wasn't a _complete_ lie. She was more... thinking of going back to work for Jerry. But 'to school' was a better ploy. Plus he'd be more apt to approve of going back to work when the alternative was doing something that would _drain_ their funds. "Four nights a week. I'd get a business degree."

He dropped her wrist, support his weight on either side of her as he pushed up, showcasing his height and, therefore, power over her, muttering, "Well, I guess that answers my question."

She supported her chin again with her hand now that he'd freed it, "Oh, no, hunny. I'm not unhappy with you." … That one _was_ a lie. "I'm not unhappy with -" She couldn't finish, her mouth open as she tried to find words. She gave up, continuing, "It's just that.." She shrugged, "Well, I was wondering what's next." Another lie. She knew what was next: this baby. But... he didn't know that yet. And.. she had to get him worried about their financial status – either through school, which she doubted she'd have the energy to attend even if Drew _did_ okay it, or through this baby – if he was going to okay her going back to Jerry. He inhaled, eyes darting nervously in their reflection, before looking down as he moved to sit beside her. She barreled on, "Hunny, the kids are practically grown. And if Corky keeps doing as well as he is, it won't be long before it's just you and me." God, help her. "And I want it to be -" she stopped, breathing harder now.

What _did_ she want it to be? … She didn't really want it to be just the two of them. She'd grown too disenchanted with him and his misogynistic behavior over the years that she wasn't sure she _could_ fall in love with him again, even if she tried and _wanted_ to give up Jerry.

She looked away, feeling guilty, "I don't know. … I want it to be _better_." Because she did. Because... deep down, a very real part of her _did_ wish she could just love her husband. Because, even if it wasn't the life she'd wanted or planned, it _was_ her life and she didn't want to hurt her family. And she wanted to be happy. But she was _so sure_ she couldn't be that with Drew anymore.

He looked down before looking to her, reminding, "Well, Becca's college is gonna be a tough one." So he _was_ worried about their finances. He exhaled, continuing, "But.. if we're real smart now and the restaurant -" he stopped, knocking twice, "-knock wood, keeps going, I can see us in the clear." How. Romantic.

'I can see us in the clear.'

… She should've listened to her mother.

"I could really help with that business degree," she pushed, knowing he'd be more concerned with the immediate withdrawals from their account than what she could add to it in the long run.

"Yeah," he nodded, the enthusiasm drained from his voice. He was worried. "Five, six years from now, I'll get a really good manager-" No he wouldn't. He wouldn't want to pay him. "-work half time, hang around the house-" She smiled again, knowing it was what he wanted. "-take trips together." She let out a weak, closed-mouth groan, like she was looking forward to it. Because it was what he wanted and expected. "-make love in the afternoon-" She opened her mouth for this exhale, a weak laugh tinged with a moan, as he kissed her hand, holding it in both of his own. "When's the last time we've done that, huh?"

Ugh. So he was back to sex. … She thought she'd derailed that train.

"I don't think I remember how," she told him, her voice a soft, teasing song. Seductive but … suggesting they not.

"It's like riding a bicycle," he tried, she smiling thinly.

She leaned, taking a deep breath through her nose before kissing his hand, "Ooh, hunny... you gotta wash those hands." He seemed disappointed and, feeling the baby kick, she reached out and stopped him, "You go to the bathroom and clean up and I'll..." She trailed off, playing with the lower hem of her nightgown, before waggling her eyebrows suggestively, "I'll just tighten my spokes."

His eyes flicked from her lips to her breasts and back up to her eyes, cautioning, "Not too tight." She breathed a laugh before he laughed as well, getting up and kissing her forehead. He started for the bathroom, "You just steer, pedal, … coast-" he waved a hand, "downhill." He disappeared into the bathroom before closing the door.

She looked back to her reflection, fighting her sigh of irritation. … Now she had to _sleep_ with him. She hadn't _meant_ to. She just... was worried he'd read the surprise in her face at feeling the baby kick. So she'd panicked and tried to distract him.

And now she had to _sleep_ with him.

Getting up, she started for the kids' rooms, hoping one of them would have an urgent, pressing need that she, as their mother, would need attended to before she could 'fool around' with Drew. And then, maybe, he'd be asleep.

She was caught, though, gasping sharply, when Drew opened the bathroom door. His shirt was off and he had a towel around his neck.

"Couldn't wait, huh?" he smirked.

She decided to go with _another_ pregnancy symptom: severe hysteria and irrationality.

She grabbed the towel, pulling him closer, "Just hold me." He seemed shocked and disappointed as she curled her arms around him but he indulgently slipped his around her in return, she repeating, "_Just hold me_."

He sighed his irritation, but – she assumed – due to her feigned desperation, didn't complain.

Instead, he guided her to their bed, walking slowly and carefully past the stairs and through their doorway – which was a bit of a squeeze, not that he mentioned it – before helping her lay down. She clutched at the towel around his neck again, whimpering, "_Drew?_"

"_Shh.. I'm right here. I'm just getting into bed,_" he assured her. She shook her head, starting to cry – she would've been _so good_ on Broadway – as she gripped the towel tighter. He indulgently didn't pull away, instead climbing over her to get to his side of the bed, she feeling a brief twinge of guilt when she felt his erection as he moved over her. But she stamped it down easily, moving to her side and nosing against the towel. "_It's alright. Shh._"

Crying. Crying was another good symptom.

She went with that, crying harder against him and the towel and letting her body shake with her sobs – that was a boner killer, right? He gently pet her shoulder, she eventually quieting before feigning sleep.

He carefully moved away from her, moving a pillow to support her and leaving the towel she still had a fast grip on, before slipping away and back to the bathroom.

… So much for a boner killer.

But it got her out of it.

* * *

><p>She exhaled as she stared at the stick. .. This was absurd. But... better to have her bases covered. Even if it seemed ridiculous to be taking a home pregnancy test when she'd felt the baby <em>kick<em> the night before. She _knew_ she was pregnant. But... her 'sudden' admission would be more believable if there happened to be the test and box in the trash. So.. might as well play the part. … And it had to read positive if some happened to check it – _gross_. But you could never tell with her nosy children and idiotic husband.

She trashed both sticks and the box without waiting for the timer to go off – she knew what it'd say.

What she was _more_ concerned about was that she was now far enough along for Sylvia to do that amnio thing she'd wanted to do. With that great big needle. Which she'd forgotten about – she'd refused when she went in earlier, Sylvia's admission that she might lose the baby by doing it so early enough to make her tell her doctor she wouldn't budge. But Sylvia had called again, before she'd gone in to pee on the stick that she knew would say she was pregnant.

And her doctor was insisting that, now that she was further along, she should take it. Now there wouldn't be a risk to the baby, at least as far as Sylvia was admitting, and it would tell her and her doctor if she could carry it and if her baby was healthy. And, as Sylvia had pointed out, she was over thirty-five, had one downs child, and two miscarriages (which she'd admitted to after Sylvia had told her one). So.. She really _should_ get the test.

… She hadn't even considered that this baby could be a downs baby. Or that she could miscarry. Which was silly, of course. As Sylvia had pointed out.

But she didn't know what to tell Jerry. … Obviously _something_ if she was going to let him assist in paying for her doctors. Which she'd have to do. Since she didn't have medical insurance since she wasn't working. And Drew's damn restaurant hardly covered her. So even if she went back _today_, she had to let Jerry help offset some of the costs of her pregnancy. He'd let her keep a company card and checkbook after Hawaii, which she'd used at the doctor the other day, but … it made her _so nervous_.

Sighing, she left the bathroom, going to her bed again and sitting down, tugging the phone into her lap and chewing her lip, before dialing.

"Thank you for calling Berkson & Berkson."

She nearly growled at the perky, young voice on the other end. Forcing a breath, she ran her hand over their baby, "I need to speak with Jerry Berkson."

The girl answered, not sounding sorry at all, "I'm sorry, Mr. Berkson is busy at the moment. May I take a message?"

"_No_. Busy doing what? I need to speak with him. It's _very_ important," she insisted.

"Is this the former Mrs. Berkson?" the girl guessed.

She blinked, "_No_. Please put Jerry on."

"He's in a meeting," his assistant hissed before speaking in a normal tone again, "But I'll be happy to take a message. Who's calling?"

She growled before hanging up.

She _couldn't wait_ for their lunch date. She had to talk to him _now_. Sylvia had scheduled her appointment for the two mornings from then. So if she was going to cancel, she had to do it _then_. What if they gave her the runaround when she called? And this was an _expensive test_. The girl at the front desk had said _twelve hundred_. Canceling too late meant you paid half, sometimes the _full cost_.

* * *

><p>She sat by the window, looking out at the stars. She'd been upset all day after missing Jerry- the louse hadn't shown up for lunch either, calling late instead and telling her about a meeting that had run over – and she <em>still<em> hadn't decided what she was doing about the amnio test.

And she still hadn't told Drew about the baby. But she _had_ to. And she'd promised Jerry- even if he was a _worm_ who blew her off.

But she'd promised. And _she_ kept her promises. … Except to Drew. Who was an even bigger worm than Jerry.

Sighing, she got up, pacing by the foot of their bed. Yes, she'd promised, but she had other things that were more important than her promise. And she wasn't even speaking to Jerry until he gave her a _better_ apology. But she still had this test she was upset about. She was nervous and worried and.. yes, panicking. Because she wasn't used to having to make these decisions on her own. And, damn it, she shouldn't _have_ to.

Licking her lips, she managed a swallow before she went to her side of the bed, climbing in and kneeling before sitting beside her sleeping husband. As predicted, the movement woke him up, he looking around in confusion.

"What's happening?" he demanded.

She spoke softly, her voice almost a desperate whisper, "_Hunny, I need to talk to you_."

He pushed himself up on his elbows, "Is everything okay?"

Did she usually wake him up in the middle of the night for chit chat?

She started crying, these tears real as opposed to the ones from the night before – damn Jerry. "Everything's either wonderful or- L-look at me," she started, looking down, "I'm in a cold sweat, my heart is racing, I feel so-"

"Baby," he started, she finally looked up from where he'd grabbed her hands. "What's wrong?"

"I feel so stupid," she breathed. … And in many ways, she did. It was... It was time for as much honesty as she could give him because she couldn't make this decision _alone_. "_Drew, I'm pregnant_."

He sat up and she couldn't tell if he was angry or just shocked, "_What?_"

"Oh, don't be mad. I couldn't deal with it if you were," she told him lowly, shaking her head as tears slipped down her cheeks.

"Mad?" he echoed, still not cluing her in as to how he felt before finally, "_You're crazy. I think it's wonderful_."

She let out a tear-strangled breath then, hugging him, "_Oh, I was so worried_." And he curled his arms around her in return and she _did_ feel guilty for doing this to him. "_Oh,_" she pushed away to look at him, still crying, and he pushed her hair back before squeezing her upper arm soothingly. "All our _plans; _getting out from under and everything."

"Oh, don't worry about that," he soothed, breathing a laugh, "Who cares about that? … A baby?"

No. A cat. Why did he have to alternate between being the man she fell in love with and the fucking moron who couldn't remember the conversation they were in the middle of? _This_ is why they drifted apart and she was carrying Jerry's baby. Because Drew couldn't _stay_ the Drew she needed. He'd be so sweet and kind and sympathetic and helpful one minute and the next he was ignoring her and implying she was stupid and ignoring their children and hiring sexy waitresses.

"We're gonna have a baby," he repeated.

She nodded, trying to keep the irritation off her face. Yes. That was what she'd fucking told him. _Damn it_. Swallowing, she pressed, "_Are you happy about it? Are you sure?_"

"Are you kiddin'?" he returned

_Who joked about this kind of question!?_ She was pregnant and crying in the middle of the fucking night! Why would this be a joke!?

"I'm- I'm- _y-eah; yeah_," he nodded.

"Ya know what they called me in the doctor's office?" she started, forgetting he couldn't know she'd been there since she'd used Jerry's account. She exhaled, he petting her shoulder, "A late-in-lifer." And he was smiling broadly, clearly proud of himself despite what she'd just told him. And his thumb was brushing against her breast far too often. But she needed his input so she couldn't storm off. "Drew, are we gonna have the energy for this?"

"Sure," he soothed, smiling widely, proud of the swimmers who weren't his... not that he knew that.

She shook her head, insisting, "It's gonna be so different having a baby now." Not the least of which would be who her baby would call 'Daddy.' Obviously, Drew. But also Jerry? Jerry wanted to be involved – he'd told her so – but how much _could_ he be? How much could they trust this baby? This was... a _hell_ of a secret. And she wanted to believe it would work out but... "We're gonna be _old_ parents." He pushed her hair back again. "When this baby graduates high school, you'll be _sixty_." His features started to fall, she continuing anyway – maybe she could get something else out of this. "And the money. Forget about traveling. Forget about _anything_. Do you know what it's going to cost just to _have_ the baby? Where are we going to get it from? Hunny, do we have health insurance?"

He'd finally found a question he could answer, offering, "Of course we do." He smiled again.

But she started crying, pressing, "_Do we have maternity insurance?_"

"... We'll deal with it," he soothed, shaking his head. "We always do." He breathed a laugh, "We'll have to."

She licked her lips, returning, "As long as we _both_ want it." Which was a lie because she'd sooner kill Drew than get an abortion. He moved his hand from her shoulder, cupping her cheek as he exhaled and she let out a shuddered breath of her own, crying, "_I'm so glad you want the baby_. _I'm so glad._" She hugged him tightly, he returning the embrace, as she continued, her voice thick with tears, "_It means so much to me_." She released him, breathing a laugh of her own, "I'm _so glad_ that you want him."

"Him?" he echoed, petting her hands where she'd dropped them to her lap.

… She shouldn't know. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit.

While, technically, her doctor hadn't been sure, Sylvia had just very _strongly_ guessed a boy.

"It's just a feeling but," she bit her lip, shrugging and hoping he'd buy it, "... I don't know how to describe it. … I already _know_ him. And it makes me afraid. I'm afraid of losing him"

He cupped her cheeks, shaking his head, whispering, "That's not in our hands."

"But it is," she corrected, crying again. "They want me to take a test. And the test could make me lose the baby."

He wiped her tears before lightly petting her hair, "Well.. so don't take it."

"But the test will tell us if it's healthy, if I can carry it, if it's another downs baby," she argued, her voice dropping as she realized she'd started speaking far above a whisper. And she knew she'd take the test, even if it meant she might lose him. Yes, she would've liked to talk about it with Jerry, but... At least she'd made a decision. … One anyway. Her voice was choked with tears when she spoke again, forcing out, "_I want a healthy baby, Drew_. _I want him to be – healthy and p-erfect. But if he's not, wha'do we do? What's fair?_"

"We'll see," Drew soothed, wiping her tears, "Just wait and see." He pet her arm before breathing a laugh, teasing, "He's not even born yet and he's already keeping us up at night." She laughed as well, hugging him again. He pulled back, smiling eagerly, "Should we tell the kids?"

She looked down, shaking her head, "What if something goes wrong? … It would just be too _hard_ for them. I don't want to get their hopes up. Nmn y- not yet. Not until we _know_." He continued wiping her tears from her cheek and chin as she stared at her lap. He leaned closer, kissing her happily. She broke the kiss, hugging him tightly as she let out an almost whimpered laugh of relief.

"Let's get back to sleep," he suggested, petting her arm. "We have … what? Eight to twelve years of being woken up in the middle of the night. Let's get our rest while we can, huh?"

She nodded, turning and laying. And, for _being there_ and listening and helping her decide, she didn't push him away when he spooned his body behind hers. … But she didn't let him rest his hand on her stomach. It would be _catastrophic_ if he felt the baby kick now.


	4. Chapter 4

"_Mmm,_" she cooed approvingly, not opening her eyes. She loved when Jerry woke her up from her naps with those light kisses to her neck and cheek.

"_I'm so happy we're having a baby,_" he whispered.

She fought to keep her features schooled at the voice.

Her husband's, _not_ Jerry's.

Oh, she'd never imagined sharing that with him would mean she'd have to deal with his being more affectionate! How was that fair!?

He kissed her lips again, "But you go back to bed, Lib. We can talk more when I get home." He squeezed her arm before closing the bedroom door behind himself, she deflating into the mattress with a groan.

* * *

><p>She didn't sleep much longer any way – stupid Drew; why would you wake up a pregnant woman? Instead, she got up when she heard the kids start downstairs, stopping in the bathroom first – this kid was putting a lot of weight on her bladder!<p>

Becca was irritably attempting to cut her cereal bowl or something, the silverware making a grating clink against the ceramic, when she strode in, picking up the kettle and flashing a smile at her babies on the way to the sink to refill it for tea – oh, she missed coffee.

She carried it back to the stove, turning the burner on beneath it and turning to smile at the kids again when Becca started, her voice cold, "Why didn't you just tell us?"

She blinked, "Tell you what?"

"You're pregnant, aren't you," her daughter answered, it not really a question.

_Where_ had her darling daughter learned to put so much disdain in her voice?

She turned to face them more, agreeing softly, "Yes, I am."

Becca looked up at the ceiling before shrugging, gesturing weakly, "Why?"

"Why?" she echoed, breathing a laugh, "Whaddya mean 'Why'? There is no 'why.' It's something that happened." Because she was shtooping Jerry five days a week. And apparently his swimmers weren't content to sit in innertubes, like Drew's were. "Aren't you happy about it?" She'd thought they would be. It was a _baby_! What was to be upset about?

"Mom, we're not children," her daughter claimed, shaking her head. Apparently they were, based on this reaction. "You don't have to keep secrets from us."

She closed her eyes, exhaling, before trying to explain, "We were waiting-"

Becca huffed a laugh, "Waiting for what!? For it to grow up?" Her voice changed, suddenly too like her condescending father, "'Oh, by the way, ya know the guy that's been hanging around? Well, he's your brother.'" She smirked.

"Becca, don't talk to me like that," she returned immediately. It was bad enough she got it from Drew; she wouldn't take it from her daughter too.

"I'm sorry," Becca answered, not sounding sorry in the least, "It's just that you and dad decide to change the whole family and don't even ask us." … She hadn't really consulted Drew in the matter either. Nor had Jerry consulted her, or vice versa. She'd just thought – at her age – it wasn't a thing that needed to be_ discussed._ Surprise. "Like we don't even count."

She looked around the kitchen, licking her lips and debating just... coming clean. Better to explain everything, right? And then she wouldn't have to hide. And-

But she couldn't do that. That _was_ changing the whole family. She pulled a chair out, sitting kitty-cornered from Becca, "We're not _changing_ the whole family."

"Oh, yeah?" her daughter challenged, "Lisa Fisher's mom had a baby and she had to drop out of tennis so she could babysit." Becca didn't even _play_ tennis. Yes, the specificity of tennis wasn't the point, but Becca didn't do anything after school that wasn't academic. She'd never ask Becca to drop something academic to babysit. Surely she had to know how important she and Drew found her education to be! "Now she has to apply to junior colleges because that's all she can afford. All for a baby!" She swung her hands forward, knocking over the milk, and they both reached to catch it, the milk puddling anyway.

She exhaled, reaching wearily for the napkins beside her and starting to blot the white puddle.

"We were fine the way we were," her daughter finished softly, she freezing at that.

No. No _she_ wasn't. The kids were, maybe, and that'd been her ultimate goal. But _she_ deserved to be 'fine' too. And she wasn't without Jerry. And she wouldn't be without this baby.

She bit her lip, staring at the milk as she sopped it up with the napkins and tried not to cry, "Do you feel the same way, Corky?"

"I don't know!" he returned, his voice harsh. She looked up at that, this sudden change in her sweet boy. "What's so great about being born anyway?"

Her eyes widened before she narrowed them a bit, pressing, "Whadda you mean?"

He looked to her, still angry, "I don't want to have my birthday."

What?

Becca looked to him then, too, her frigid facade melting a bit.

"Your birthday?" she echoed, stopping her attempt at cleaning the milk. She dropped her hands to her lap, "Hunny, do you understand what we're talking about?" She _hated_ talking to him like he didn't understand. But she had to know. She couldn't assume he did and have him be confused or misinterpret.

"I understand," he confirmed. "I don't mind about the baby." _Finally_. One supportive answer. "But why do we have to have my birthday?" he pressed.

She hesitated – she _loved_ celebrating her beautiful boy – before shaking her head, offering, "We don't." … If he didn't want a party this year, that was his choice. And he was being sweet enough to her to support the new baby. She had to support him, more now than ever.

Becca sighed, Corky nodding a bit, "Good."

She set down another napkin, Becca pushing herself up and deciding, "We'd better get to school." Corky took her lead, pushing his chair back as well.

She watched them go, Becca turning around to give her another sad look, before exhaling as the door closed, dropping her head to her hands.

_Where_ was Jerry? Or Drew? She shouldn't have to deal with this _alone_.

* * *

><p>"Libs? Oh, thank God! I was starting to worry that something had h-"<p>

Growling, she hung up the phone.

That was not a proper apology and she wasn't accepting anything less.

And why had it taken him nearly three days to even call her? What the fuck kind of apology took three days? Not a lousy-ass phone call. That was for certain.

She'd been snapped at by her children that morning. And had to endure making the decision regarding amnio alone. And then he calls? Just a phone call!?

No.

He needed to do better.

She sighed when the phone rang again, "_What?_"

"Don't hang up!" he pleaded, speaking quickly.

"What do you want, Jerry?" she demanded.

"I'm _sorry_," he tried. "I had meetings all d-"

She shook her head, interrupting him, "_Not. Good. Enough_."

He sounded panicked, trying again, "But I love you! And the baby! Please don't hang up, Libs."

"Why shouldn't I?" she demanded. "I kept trying to call you about the amnio test and you didn't answer and now it's scheduled and I have to go and you didn't answer until now!"

"Amnio?" he echoed.

She nodded, "Yes. Amnio. It's a test that might make me lose the baby and it's really the biggest decision I've had to make since we found out that Corky had Downs. And even that wasn't even a decision. So it's been the biggest decision I've had to make since leaving behind acting and I had to make it _myself_ and you weren't here for me when I was crying and pacing and breaking out in a cold sweat and you don't even _care!_"

He seemed stunned into silence, "Wh- you could lose the baby? And you're doing it!? Why would you take that chance? Libby!"

"Don't _yell_ at me!" she squawked. "I'm doing it because it'll tell me if the baby's healthy and if I can carry it and because I _have_ to, Jerry! So don't you _dare_ yell at me!"

"I'm sorry," he amended. "I'm so sorry, Libby. Please forgive me? I promise I won't be this distant in the future. I'll tell my assistant to always put your calls through. No matter what."

She clucked her tongue, "How are you going to explain that, Jerry? Huh? How are you going to explain that? You're not married. Who are you going to say it is? Me? I _quit_, Jerry. Remember!?"

He exhaled in her ear and she hung up again without waiting to hear what he was planning to say.

How _dare_ that man sigh in her ear that way? Was this a fucking joke to him!?

"What!?" she screeched when the phone rang again, picking it up on the first ring.

"Lib?"

She exhaled, closing her eyes and forcing a smile that she hoped would come out in her voice, "Hi, hunny."

"Is everything okay? I just wanted to check on my baby. And my baby," her husband joked.

She forced a small laugh, "We're fine. It's just... been a rough morning."

She could practically _hear_ his deportment change on the other end and she wished she'd chosen her words better. "What? What happened? Is everything alright? Is it the baby?"

"We're fine," she repeated, unconsciously petting her stomach. "I just... Becca found the test. And .. she's upset about it. And then J- Jerry called."

"Why?" he asked, immediately suspicious.

But she couldn't exactly have tried to turn 'Jerry' into something else. Not without having had her tea. Which she hadn't had since she'd been too upset.

She shrugged, lying, "Something about some question about the office. He doesn't even know how to run his own office, hunny. I don't know how he was my _boss_. And telemarketers called. And it's just been so stressful!"

He cooed, "Aww. You poor thing! Well you just put your feet up and relax, okay? I'll call the school and leave a message for the kids to come here for dinner. And I'll have them bring you home something. I wish I could come home for lunch, but you know we're so swamped then. If I can get away after the lunch rush, I'll try, how's that sound?"

"Thanks, babe," she breathed a smile. "That's sweet."

"No problem. You just _relax_. Rest up and have a good day," he insisted.

She nodded, echoing, "Have a good day." She hung up again before propping her elbow on the table and dropping her chin to it.

_God_, she was just exhausted.

The phone rang again, she jumping a bit before reaching, "Hello?" She waited for an answer before repeating, "Hello? Who's calling?"

"Hello?"

She blinked, repeating, "Hello?"

"Is this a Libby?"

She looked around her kitchen, confused, "Yes? This is she. Who's calling?"

"Some guy just gave me this number and said to call you," the man told her.

What?

She combed her fingers through her unwashed hair, "What? Who? Who is this?"

He made loud chewing noises – so a friend of Drew's perhaps? - before answering, "Well my name's Eric. But the guy who paid me ten dollars to call you didn't give me his name."

"What in the _world_?" she started, looking around again. Was this some sort of joke? "Why are you calling?"

"I was just told to keep you on the line," he answered.

She blinked again, confused, "_Why?_"

He continued chewing before answering, "Don't really know. I was told to keep you on the phone until- oh. It's eleven. I called earlier but your line was busy."

"What does that have to do with-" she started.

"You're supposed to look out your window now," he instructed.

She froze, suddenly nervous, "Why? Who told you to call me?"

"Your back window, ma'am," he specified before hanging up.

She looked around nervously, swallowing, before going to the closet first and grabbing a broom. "_Arnold!_" she hissed, clapping her thigh. "_Arnold!_" The dog ran from the den, sitting by her feet and wagging his tail excitedly. Exhaling, she started for the back door, the broom held up for protection and the family dog at her heels. She took a deep breath before swinging the door open.

"Jerry?!" she gasped, dropping the broom.

He looked around before stepping inside and closing the door behind himself, she stepping back to give him room, "Surprise!"

She blinked before swatting at him, "What are you _doing_ here!? You scared me half to death! Was that you who paid that man to call? What _was _that!?"

"You wanted a better apology," he reminded. "So I grabbed my car, drove by the restaurant to make sure Drew wouldn't be home, paid some homeless guy ten dollars and a Big Mac meal to call you and keep you distracted until 11, stopped at a florist and _whoa-o!_ Here I am!" He pressed the flowers – _gorgeous _lilies and roses – into her hands before gripping her upper arms and holding her in place as he kissed her hard. "Forgive me?"

"I- uhm-" she stammered, looking down at the flowers in confusion.

"I brought lunch," he added, leading her away from the door and to the table. He pulled a chair out for her, she sitting in it heavily, before setting the bag hanging from his wrist down. "It's McDonalds," he revealed, an apology in his voice. "I didn't wanna make too many stops."

She blinked, looking up at him, "I- _thank you_."

"So I figured we could eat lunch and you could tell me about the amnio thing and we can figure something out so that they'll always put your calls through at the office. Maybe we'll say you're my dad's nurse or something. I don't know. But we'll figure it out, okay?" he tried, starting to unpack the bag of food.

She dropped the flowers to the table, blinking up at him, and he stopped unpacking food. ".. Is that a no, you don't forgive me?" She pushed her chair back, he deflating as she stood up. "C'mon, Libs. Please? I love you. Doesn't that count? I know I messed up. But I love you and-"

She curled her fingers in his lapel, pushing him backwards against the door frame leading out of the kitchen, before pressing her body to his and kissing him hard.

"Wh-"

"This is the most romantic thing I think anyone's ever done for me," she told him softly, speaking against his lips. "_Thank you_ for caring enough to do all this to apologize."

He smiled, "So I'm forgiven?"

She nudged him, warning, "Don't _ever_ apologize like this again, though. You scared the _hell_ out of me! I thought- I don't know what I thought!"

"Sorry. I guess it was a little frightening. I didn't think it through entirely. But I knew I couldn't go to the front door. And I knew I couldn't park here – I had to park around the corner. And I knew I couldn't be standing outside. So I figured if you came to the door _right_ as I came up, it'd be okay. I didn't realize it would be scary to you," he admitted.

She exhaled, "... I didn't get dressed. I'm still in my pjs. I haven't even brushed my hair." Thank _God_ she'd thought to brush her teeth when she'd gone in to relieve herself that morning. She hadn't made it back upstairs to get washed and dressed – this kid made the stairs seem so much longer these days – but she'd at least brushed her teeth. She subconsciously reached up to smooth it down. "Lemme run upstairs and get washed and dressed and then we can have lunch, hmm?"

He kissed her again, "I think you look beautiful."

She made a low noise of protest, shaking her head even as he kissed her again, "No; oh, Jer, stop. I do not."

"You do," he repeated, tilting his head to kiss her neck as he tugged her closer.

"_Nmm_.." she insisted, her eyelids flickering before she cooed softly and let him push her against the wall by the stairs, her head leaning against the brass frame of the picture there.

His mouth traced the lining of her nightgown, teasing the bare hint of cleavage there, "_This is cute, Libs. You should wear stuff like this to work._" His hands found her hips before he started dragging the long skirt of her gown up, teasing her bare thigh. She hummed through a moan of approval when his mouth moved back to her throat, sucking teasingly as his fingers toyed with the elastic at her hip.

She was near panting, arching against him as she scratched at his shoulder through his blazer, "Jer-Jer... No. St- we shouldn't."

"The kids are at school," he soothed. "And Drew won't be home for lunch. He works at a _restaurant, _Libs."

Drew had said as much earlier on the phone.

Licking her lips, she gently pushed him back, disentangling herself before quickly going to the blinds by the door and closing them. She didn't return right away, though, repeating the action in each of the rooms on the lower level before returning to him and pushing him against the coat closet under the steps, the doorknob digging into his back, "_I want you so much, darling._"

He reached up, carefully undoing the top button before pushing her back against the opposite wall, his mouth at her throat as he undid another button. "_I could get used to you in pajamas,_" he teased, kissing lower. She curled her fingers in his hair as he nudged fabric out of the way to expose her left breast.

"_Jerry,_" she breathed her voice a soft whine.

"No pesky bras or stockings or extra layers," he continued anyway, ignoring her plea as he undid another button. He smoothed his left hand past the small gap, working her right breast as his breath and the occasional brush of his lips teased the left.

She swallowed, closing her eyes as she tried to force his mouth closer, complaining, "_Then why are you taking longer to undress me if there's less to do?_"

He breathed a chuckle, "_Foreplay doesn't change despite what you're wearing, my sweet_."

"_We're playing with fire,_" she argued, getting frustrated and pushing him back against the coat closet as she feverishly clawed at his belt. "We don't know if someone could come home here; it's not like your place."

He grabbed her wrists, teasing, "But doesn't that just make it more exciting to draw it out? Drew could walk through that door at _any minute._" She looked at the front door, chewing her lip and hesitating.

He'd meant it to be playful, but it _was_ all too unwelcome a reminder.

And after what Becca had said to her earlier? About changing the whole family? What if _she_ came home while she and Jerry were going at it by the kitchen? What would _that_ do to her darling -

"_Jer!_" she gasped, closing her eyes, when he took advantage of her hesitation to push her back against the wall and suck at her throat again, making heat coil tightly in her lower abdomen and throb between her thighs. She pushed his blazer from his shoulders and down his arms before tugging at his shirt and untucking it from his pants.

"_What, Libs?_" he encouraged, speaking hotly against the shell of her ear as he started hiking the skirt of her nightgown up again. He let it fall back down around his wrist as he teased her through her underwear. "_Ya wanna finally have an orgasm in your own house?_ _How about two? Or four? Let me do that for you, Libs._"

She closed her eyes again, licking her lips, before stopping him, "Jer, you're making it weird."

He leaned away slightly, confused, "What? Why?"

Exhaling, she opened her eyes, "I'm not with you to _spite_ Drew. I'm with you because I love you. And... the way you keep bringing him into it just... makes it seem like you're doing it for Drew and not me."

"Whaddya mean?" he blinked.

"I mean... I want you to make love to me because you love me," she started.

He nodded seriously, interrupting her, "I _do_ love you."

"But it doesn't_ feel_ that way, hunny. It feels like you're doing it... to Drew, not _for_ me. And I know you love me. I'm just asking... for a little more romance and a little less flaunting the sneaking around. We don't _have_ to do anything," she added, reaching and cupping his cheeks before kissing him sweetly, "I'm just … flattered you came over here with flowers and lunch."

He exhaled, nodding haltingly, "Yeah... Right. Okay."

"Okay?" she pressed, kissing him again.

"Of course," he smiled, kissing her back lightly.

She released his face, smoothing her nightgown down before doing up the few button he'd undone, "So how about we have lunch, hmm?" He nodded, not answering more than that as he looked down. She kissed his cheek, "You go sit in the den and I'll grab the food after I put the flowers in some water." He obediently started for the den, she breathing a smile and shaking her head as he walked away, sulking. "Such a child," she teased, pursing her lips, before going to the kitchen.

She got a vase down, starting to fill it with water before snipping the bottoms off the flowers and arranging them. She smiled when she felt him curl his arms around her waist.

"I'm sorry," he offered, kissing the back of her neck and petting the baby.

"No need to apologize," she cooed, lightly tracing shapes on his hands.

"But I made you feel like it wasn't about how much I love you," he reminded. "I don't _ever_ want to make you feel like that."

She smiled, leaning back against him, "Honestly, it's fine."

He shook his head, turning her around to face him, "It's not. I love you more than anything in this whole world, Libs. And I think you're the most beautiful woman to ever live – I really do – so, when I look at you, I _always_ want to make love to you. Nothing in this world gives me more pleasure and happiness and satisfaction than seeing the deliriously happy, satisfied smile on your face after we make love. And nothing is more beautiful to me than the faces and noises you make while we make love." She started to blush again, heat creeping up her neck and settling in her cheeks as she started to look down before he tipped her chin up, kissing her lightly before continuing, "But that is always about _you_. It is never ever _ever_ about anyone or anything else. It's not about my ex wife or Drew or _anyone_. It's about that radiant look on your beautiful face after, when you're laying beside me and panting and your makeup and hair are mussed and your skin is flushed."

"_Oh, Jer,_" she exhaled, starting to cry. "_That was so beautiful_."

"Not like you," he returned, kissing her again. "I just want to make sure you always always know that my love for you is about you and your beautiful heart and perfect smile. I don't _ever_ want you to think that comes second. It's second to _nothing._"

She took his hands, kissing his knuckles before kissing his lips again as she squeezed his hands, "_I love you too. … D-do you wanna go upstairs?_"

"Whatever you're comfortable with, Libs," he smiled.

She nodded, leading him up the stairs, "I am." She hesitated as she walked by a picture of the family, stopping and gripping the railing, "... B-but maybe not upstairs."

He indulgently stopped, promising, "We don't have to do anything."

"... I just think it might be weird, ya know? Like.. in Drew's bed? Plus... I mean, it'd smell like sex. And Drew'd know it wasn't with him."

"Of course," he agreed, repeating, "We don't have to do anything."

She bit her lip, turning to face him, "I just.. I don't think _in his bed_ is the best idea."

"We could just have lunch," he suggested.

She hugged him before nodding, "That might be best." She let him lead her back down to the kitchen.

* * *

><p>She curled against him in his bed, chewing her lip, "... I hate that you couldn't be there with me."<p>

He stroked her back, "Me too. But you said it went okay."

"It did... " she looked up at him, "... I hate that I have to keep this secret. I just .. I wanna be with you all the time and it's so stupid that I can't be."

"But Drew's being good to you?" Jerry pressed.

She breathed a laugh, nodding, "Yes, you worry-wort."

"Hey, I have twice the reason to be worried now," he teased.

She ran a hand over her stomach, "He wants to be with me for the amnio; he wants to hold my hand."

He hugged her tightly, "That's good, right?"

"Yeah... but I wish it could be you. I'm so worried about..._everything_," she started, he sensing by the stiffness of her body that she was starting to cry. "_And-and you won't be there, Jer. You won't be there and I'm scared for our baby!_"

He hugged her again, cooing, "_Shhh. I am here, Libs. I won't be in the room, but I am always here for you. Just relax._"

"_I can't!_" she argued, clutching him. "_I'm so scared about what the test will say! And if it make me lose the baby!_"

He moved a hand to her stomach, soothing, "Shh. You said the chance is very slim, right?"

"What if Sylvia's wrong!?" she squawked.

"It's important that we know, Libs... so we can prepare. But... just... relax and take advantage of our quiet afternoon, hmm? Why don't you sleep?" he soothed.

She nodded reluctantly, pulling herself closer and leaning her head on his chest so she could hear his heart beating steadily in her ear.

… Everything _had_ to be alright. It _had_ to be.

* * *

><p>She reached behind her in bed, still mostly asleep, "Mm?"<p>

It was _never_ cold when Drew was in bed – the man was a space heater, for better or worse.

"Hunny?" she murmured, looking behind her when her hand met with empty sheets.

Confused, she got up, looking around the room before opening the bedroom door to see him looking in on Corky – she was feeling sentimental too with the new baby, it made sense that he was too, she supposed.

She moved over, ducking under his extended arm to cuddle against him, explaining, "_I got a chill_." He hugged her to him, she returning his embrace as they watched their darling Corky. "... _You're always so warm_."

He pressed a kiss to her head in response, still quietly watching, before - "Babe... are we ready for this?"

"I don't know, Drew," she admitted.

His chest expanded as he inhaled deeply, hesitating a moment. "... What if it's... another Downs baby?" He didn't say anything, waiting for her, but she couldn't speak.

She didn't _know_. She couldn't... _do_ anything about it either way; she wouldn't.

"I mean..." he continued, his voice soft, "at this point in our lives are we really prepared to deal with that? … Can we really do it again? … And if not, are we... willing to face that decision?"

She collected herself, managing, ".. You mean not have the baby?"

He didn't answer, tensing in her arms, before exhaling, "Yes."

"... I don't think I would know how to do that," she returned.

She couldn't. It didn't matter. It- he didn't understand – _this was her baby; her son_. She'd felt him move, she'd heard his heart beat, she'd seen his little picture. Even if it weren't her little piece of Jerry, she couldn't do it. But.. that it was Jerry's meant it even more.

And if Drew wanted to... Well, Jerry had made it very clear he'd love to marry her. So she'd leave. She didn't _want_ to wreck Corky's stability, but she would if it was that or lose her unborn son.

"... Can you imagine _not_ having Corky?" she pressed, not _wanting_ to be forced to choose between her two sons. … It was unpleasant for her, but _easier_ on the family if she stayed, which she could only do if Drew wouldn't press for an abortion.

"Not for a minute," he returned, a smile in his voice as he hugged her again. "... But can you imagine doing it again?"

She closed her eyes tightly – was he kidding? It was practically all she'd been thinking about since Sylvia had brought it up. She was _petrified_. But it didn't _change_ anything, not really.

It only changed... where she'd end up living. But, as long as the test didn't make her _lose_ the baby, she was having it – with or without Drew's support.

* * *

><p>She sat at the table – it'd been weeks since the test and every time the phone rang, she about jumped out of her skin; it was <em>maddening<em>.

Exhaling, she picked up the phone and closed her eyes, "_Hello?_"

"Mrs. T?"

God, it was the overly chipper front desk nurse. … it had to be good news, then, right? Sylvia wouldn't let this ditzy child deliver earth-shattering news.

"Speaking," she croaked, scratching at the tablecloth.

"I just wanted to say congratulations!"

She held her breath, nearly crying – that meant her baby was okay! "_He's healthy?_"

"He is!" the girl confirmed. "Now, the doctor wants you to come back in two weeks for a checkup, but the amnio revealed that your baby is perfectly healthy."

"Oh, _thank you_," she breathed, crying now. "_Thank you so much!_"

"Congratulations," the girl repeated, a smile in her voice.

She hung up, combing her fingers through her hair before resting her elbows on the table.

He was healthy, which was wonderful. Her baby was healthy and strong and everything would be fine.

Which meant Drew wouldn't push for an abortion.

… Which meant she should stay with him, and not go to Jerry... even though the idea had been nagging at her since Drew had suggested the abortion. But there was no reason now. So it'd just be cruel to Corky. She couldn't do that to him. It wasn't fair.

She dropped her arms to the table, crying selfishly.

She didn't know how long she sat like that before she heard the door close, Becca's voice intruding on her selfish little pity party.

"Hello? Mom? Mom, whats the matter?"

And she didn't know how to answer. Because it was supposed to be _good_ news. But she was sobbing at the table like she'd just been told her baby was terminally ill. "He's- _p-perfect!_" Becca smiled, moving closer and hugging her, and she clung to her daughter. "_Hunny, you have to forgive your old mom._" She released her enough so she could look up at her from her seat, admitting, "_Things have been a little crazy lately. I've been so worried about the baby and I-I-I've been riding the hormone express._" She laughed when Becca did, her daughter sweetly pushing back her hair where it clung to the tears on her cheeks, "_It's-_" She sniffed back tears as she explained, "_It's like being a teenager._"

Becca laughed again, teasing, "So now you know." She reached, pushing her sweet daughter's hair back as the girl admitted, "I guess I've been kind of selfish about the baby."

"No," she shook her head, still playing with the girl's hair, "I understand. I do."

"I'm glad you're having it," her daughter decided, looking down at her

"_Really?_" she asked, feeling about to cry again. She hugged her daughter tightly.

Becca hugged her back, amending, "I'm glad we're having it. Having him- her." She threw up a hand, so much like her mother.

She shook her head, swearing, "_Hunny, I won't ask you to babysit all the time. I promise. And college- we'll make it happen. Don't worry-_"

"I know we will," her daughter soothed. "I guess I just freaked out."

She smiled, teasing, "_Welcome to the club_." They both laughed before she shook her head, confiding, "This test has been a nightmare. .. Hunny, you don't know what a relief it is. He's a normal baby._ A healthy, strong, normal baby._"

"I'm really happy," Becca agreed, smiling widely.

She looked over, hearing something in the foyer, and her eyes went wide and her arms fell when she saw how devastated her son looked, clearly having heard her speech. "Corky?" She pushed herself up, using the doorjam to ballast herself and go to him even as he looked ready to run, "Corky!"

… And, of course, he did, heading for the door he'd left open and tripping down the front steps as she chased after him, yelling "_Corky!_" She gasped,"_Cork!_" She half-ran down the steps, sitting on the grass beside where he'd fallen on the bricks, trying to help him up, "_Corky, hunny, are you-_"

"Leave me alone!" he yelled, struggling against her.

She yelled over him, still trying to help him up, "_Are you alright!?_" She finally managed to get him to sit up, checking and deciding, "Hunny, you're hurt."

"You don't care!" he accused.

"_I do!_" She held his shoulders, looking at her beautiful baby.

He looked back at her, insisting, "No you don't. … You don't want me!"

"Corky, I _do_," she repeated, gripping his shoulders so he couldn't take off again.

"No you don't," he pressed, adding, "You wish I was normal!"

She shook him a bit, her pregnant hormones kicking in and making her more upset than she might normally be by these accusations, "Hunny, that's not true; it's not!"

… That and the fact that, just weeks ago she'd said essentially that to Jerry when selfishly lamenting that she couldn't leave Drew for him.

"It is," he argued, yelling, "I heard you!"

She inhaled before grabbing his chin with her right hand, "Listen to me; you're my first child. You're my _very special_ first boy. You're the first thing I think about in the morning and my last dream at night." She started crying a bit, "_You mean everything to me. Do you understand what I'm saying? … You mean everything to me._"

He looked at her, clearly torn, before reminding, "You were happy that the baby wasn't like me!"

She licked her top lip before running her tongue along her teeth, "Would you be happy if the baby had Downs Syndrome?" He turned his head away and she quickly tilted his face back towards hers with her grip on his chin, inhaling before continuing, "I want the best for all my children." He didn't say anything for a long moment, but he did lean his head forward, she releasing his chin and resting her forehead against his as she exhaled.

After a while, Becca moved forward, squeezing her shoulder, before suggesting, "Let's go inside."

"Okay," she agreed, exhaling shakily before hugging Corky tightly.

* * *

><p>"Jerry?" she started, chewing her lip – she hadn't told him Drew's veiled suggestion for an abortion if the baby hadn't been healthy, and she didn't think it was fair to dangle that in front of him now that she knew it wouldn't give her the out she'd hoped for.<p>

"This is him," he returned, sounding distracted, "How can we at-"

"Jerry!" she snapped, glaring as she held the phone to her ear.

"L-" he started, "Please hold." She heard him get up before the door closed, "Hello? Libby?"

She nodded, "Mhmm. I- I wanted to tell you I got the results of the test."

He waited before pressing, "Yes? And? How's my son?"

"_Perfect_," she smiled, crying. "I'm- Oh, Jer, I'm so happy and relieved."

"He's healthy?" he demanded. "Oh, Libby.. Th- That's such good news. Can I take you out? I want to celebrate. Let's go to dinner. Can we do dinner? We'll go someplace outta town. C'mon, say yes."

She chewed her lip before exhaling and agreeing, "... I think I can convince Drew to have the kids have dinner at the restaurant so I can get some rest. Not tonight though. Tomorrow?"

"Whaddya say I take a half day tomorrow? I'll come pick you up for lunch and we'll order room service at some swanky hotel and then we'll go to dinner. Maybe a show? We'll go to Chicago," he promised.

She smiled, running a hand over their baby, "... That sounds perfect. I'll arrange it tonight. But I'll have to be home after dinner. Are there matinees tomorrow?"

He hesitated, "I don't know. But I'll figure something out and I'll take you someplace nice. I'm so happy, Libby. I love you so much."

"_I love you too, Jer,_" she breathed.

… She needed to go back to work. She _hated_ being away from him all the time like this.


End file.
